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Ask the Divorced Guy!
by Dean Hughson
Title: How can Christians Divorce
Question:
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I am a recently divorced 30 y/o with no children and was married for 3 years.
We dated for about 20 months before that. She all of a sudden decided at the
beginning of Aug. 1997 that " I am not happy with the marrige for some reason
and have 'feelings' for someone else and am not coming back home". I enjoyed
being married and having companionship, etc. I am afriad that I am to old for
there to be that many available women out their and will never have a family.
I do not even know how to start dating again. As you can imagine I am very
lonely. Any input?????????
Answer:
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First off....I'm sorry.....being dumped hurts like hell and lots of friends and family don't know what to say to you...been there,saw it.......now how do you dig out of this hole?
1. decide if it is truly over.......This is something you must realize for yourself and if it isn't find good counseling help to help the two of you.
2. if nothing can be done, accept it and begin to recover...sleep/eat/rest/exercise as well as you can....you need to feel good to begin the recovery process of your mind which will follow your body. if you need more help go and see a therapist, a divorce recovery group..whatever it takes.
3. Don't want to belittle you but realize I was dumped at 40...if this old middle aged obese man could find love again (which I did with a young beautiful psychologist from Mexico) anyone can.....you have to get back into the swing of dating....answer some ads in the personals in the newspapers, let friends know you are available...nothing heavy..just date for enjoyment......and if perchance love comes again,which it usually does, enjoy it blindly and savor it...that is what life is about. let me know how you are doing...I care.
Dean Hughson, called the Dear Abby of Divorced Dads by the KC Star, is the founder of the DIVORCE HOMEPAGE. He has talked to thousands of people contemplating divorce, going through divorce, or the chaos afterwards and gives referrals and advice. He resides in Nevada, the state with the highest divorce rate in the US.
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