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Ask the Divorced Guy!
by Dean Hughson
Title: Am I Falling in Love on the Rebound?
Question:
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I have been separated from my ex-wife for over a year and officially divorced for 2 months. I have dated quite a few people and didn't feel anything special. Recently I met someone who I feel in 'love' with. Some of my friends and family are warning me about 'rebounding'. What is your feeling? How do I know if I am rebounding?
Answer:
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Rebound doesn't have much meaning to me.....basically what you need to listen to is your heart...Are you feeling self-content again? Are you desperate to remarry or have you truly found someone you love? If you aren't sure date her exclusively for a while and see how it goes? I have seen a few people marry too quickly but the basics of the relationship are what makes the relationship strong, not the length of time you have been divorced or separated. How do you convince her? If she isn't convinced of your love she isn't the person for you. I would talk my heart talk with her..what I am feeling, thinking, wanting, and see if she loves you. For love to work a miracle occurs and I hope it is your time. Life is too short to be alone and not to be in love. If you still can't figure out where you are, go to a therapist and talk it out. They may be able to elicit feelings from you that you aren't able to express yet. Congratulations on taking a risk on love again. It makes all the difference.
Dean Hughson, called the Dear Abby of Divorced Dads by the KC Star, is the founder of the DIVORCE HOMEPAGE. He has talked to thousands of people contemplating divorce, going through divorce, or the chaos afterwards and gives referrals and advice. He resides in Nevada, the state with the highest divorce rate in the US.
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