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Ask the Divorced Woman!
by Maria Costa
Title: Father Refuses to Pay Support
My daughter is seven years old and has not seen her father for almost five
years. He does not pay child support ( he is required to by law but
enforcement is difficult ) and has no effort to see his daughter, my dilemma
is my daughter would very much like to see her father. I have written him a
letter expressing her wish and letting him know that if he takes an active
role in her life I will not pursue the support issue. I could use the
financial help raising her but it is more important to me that she be
happy. What do I do ? This situation is very painful for my daughter and I
want to do what's right for her.
Unfortunately, you can't make or force parents to SEE their children.
Besides it would be more traumatic for the children if they did see them
against their wishes.
For now keep a copy of the letter you sent him and tell your daughter
that at this time her daddy doesn't wish to see her or depending on how
mature she is tell her you don't know where he is...
Another words for now until she gets older - make an excuse for him that
will be easier on her. When she gets older - sit down with her and show
her the letter than explain to her that he didn't want to get involved.
This is one of the SADDEST repercussions of divorce - children!
Pick up my book "When the Vows Break: Living Through Separation &
Divorce" it will help you with the above questions plus how to join
support groups which you need to do! If you can't find it in your local
bookstore call my toll free number 888-267-3929 PIN #7176.
Maria Costa (Author & Seminar Speaker) A well known certified speaker
and seminar leader, continues to inspire, motivate and challenge people to push their envelopes farther, both before and after experiencing divorce. A graduate of National-Louis University,
with a Masters in Management, Ms. Costa is very active in her community. She
is President of the Board of Directors of the Women's Resource Center, Fredericksburg, VA, President of Hispanic Internal Revenue Employees (HIRE), IRS, Washington Chapter and board member of Professional Women's Network. Be sure to visit Maria Costa's web site
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