Cooperation From Your Spouse During Divorce

If your spouse is uncooperative, everything will have to be done the slow and costly way. Have you and your spouse been able to sit down and talk? Have the two of you constructively worked out any of the separation details such as paying the bills, seeing the children and using funds in the checking and savings accounts? If so, there is high hope that your case will be straightforward.

Otto brought in a handwritten spreadsheet when he came to see me for the first time. It showed in detail the funds available, the expenses of the household he had moved out of, his own expenses and his allocation of funds to meet needs. Virginia, his wife, would never think of throwing out the informal agreement they had reached. This outline resolved all the immediate financial concerns in an honest way, and Otto was honoring it. Virginia would be lucky to do as well in court. Otto had saved them a costly battle, and she knew it. Off to a constructive start, Otto and Virginia avoided trips to court completely. The only act the court had to perform was to approve their agreement. They maximized what they each ended up with, and paid a minimum to their attorneys.

List the issues that you and your spouse have discussed so far, and the results. Show with a note in the margin how well the two of you have resolved your problems (good, some or little cooperation).