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Diagnosing Each Other
(Provided by How to Stop Your Divorce)

Have you ever been ill and experienced puzzling or mysterious symptoms? It is quite disconcerting to know that you are not well but have no idea of what exactly is wrong. Regarding your physical health, obtaining a physicianís diagnosis can be comforting. You know that if there is a name for your condition, then there is probably some form of treatment that will make things better. In regard to marital relationships, being diagnosed by your spouse is never a welcomed experience!

Michael and Nancy shared a bad habit of diagnosing one anotherís behaviors as being crazy, neurotic, over and under sensitive, passive-aggressive, depressed, etc. These labels may have been helpful to the person making the diagnosis but they only served to inflame the person being diagnosed.

Suggestions:
1. Unless you are a physician identifying a patientís physical health condition, avoid making diagnoses.
2. Labels may be helpful to you in determining how to or not to respond to your spouseís behavior. Remember that your perception of reality may be wrong! So, keep your labels to yourself.
3. Diagnosing your spouseís mental health is a form of glorified name-calling. Refrain from this practice at all costs.

Information provided by:
How to Stop Your Divorce
http://www.divorcesource.com/info/stopyourdivorce/stopyourdivorce.shtml

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