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General Forums >> Domestic Abuse
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soon2bfree07
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What do you do when you know?
      #162146 - 12/14/07 08:55 AM (68.49.108.130)
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Should I do anything?
I know for a fact that my stbx is being physically abused by his g/f. She's been to jail 3x's for it?
I talked to her probation officer and she said that if it happens again, she will just spend a longer amount of time in jail, but as long as my stbx takes her back, there's not much anyone can do.

I posted this story about him in the Karma posts and was laughing about it, (what comes around, goes around!) but he will never regain visitation rights with our child if he continues to let this happen.
Should I maybe send him literature on where to get help?
He may be embarrassed since he's a man!
Or should I just let him reap what he sowed?!!!

I do keep all documentation, ie her police records and court documents, because as long as he's with her, I am NOT allowing my child around him!


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jersey girl
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Re: What do you do when you know? [Re: soon2bfree07]
      #162150 - 12/14/07 09:23 AM (71.201.60.23)
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If you feel he needs help - I would get to one of his friends with proof - not feelings. Ask them to get him help and then leave it alone.

It is not karma, it is life and your life is not with him anymore. If you get involved directly, it will be seen as interfering and biased.

Very hard to do when your instinct is to help.


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soon2bfree07
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Re: What do you do when you know? [Re: jersey girl]
      #162260 - 12/14/07 09:36 PM (68.49.108.130)
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You're right, it would be interferring! If he wanted help in order to pursue visitation w/our child, he would seek help on his own!!

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jersey girl
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Re: What do you do when you know? [Re: soon2bfree07]
      #162268 - 12/14/07 10:03 PM (71.201.60.23)
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No - he won't, but the boundaries have to be up all the time. It is not your role or your job anymore as much as that goes against the grain.

Part and parcel of anyone involved with an ex with substance abuse, mental health or other dependency issues.


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