Divorce Support Forums: emotional/psychological abuse?

Ill try to answer all your questions to give you a better picture. she has threatened and done it many times since ive known her, only once before has she actually left with our 1yr old son (at that time). she actually pulled him out of bed at midnight bc she and i were arguing about something, she/they ended up missing their flight out of state for a family get together(i made it after pushing it back while waiting for her). so no, not all instances were while pregnant, just the recent 8 months has she been pregnant and still acting this way. i have come to just go along with her rants and raves about leaving bc she rarely ever does and then is back the next day...its still bs.
as for our son, i care for him 100% of the time that i can, which is more than 50% of the time, if that makes sense. either way, i pull my share plus some of the load. i usually keep him on my days off while she is at work, yet like today i had to work and she was off, she took him to preschool. i dont quite understand that one. i work a typical police schedule. i get up at 4 am and am home as late as 7 pm. so its hard for me to dress and drive him to preschool on the mornings i have to work, but when i dont work, i do drive him or just keep him with me and we play and hang out all day.up until a month or so ago, i did all the outside chores, the dishes, clothes, cleaning bathrooms, the dog, bathe our son every night, tuck him in etc...dinner(when i am home to make it)pick our son up from school...you name it, i did it. bc im a neat and clean freak about the house, until i felt unappreciated about it all, now i let it sit until she does it...and that is a while. hell,i went in later today and was kinda running almost late, and still dressed my son at his request...why bc hes my son and if i can do something for or with him, i will, even if i only have a few seconds to do it!
weve been to counseling, she thought everything was all my fault, the counselor actually said in so many words it was more how she mistreated me and didnt show me enought attention etc...i told her earlier this week i wanted to see a counselor by myself while she did the same then we could figure ourselves out first then go together, she said marraige counseling is for couples, not individuals...that was her way of saying no.
i understand she is pregnant, but my mother had 4, ive got friends who are pregnant, our first son, she was okay. millions of women are pregnant every day, does that mean there are millions of misserable husbands out there too? i dont think so. i support her the best i can knowing and feeling the way i do, but i really feel like its a one way street, and she gives way only when its convinient to her, or theres something in it for her.
just this week she has trown an adult tantrum in public, left home with our son, come back, threatened to buy tickets to fly home for christmas, and tried to talk about our problems(this is funny, this is how she opened the conversation) as she came into the tv room after my son was asleep "what do you have to say for yourself?" needless to say, that conversation didnt go off to well. anyway, nothing was resolved, but now she seems to think everything is alright, like nothing ever happened. she has always acted like a new day meant there was never an argument or conflict the day before. i guess thats positive outlook, but nothing ever gets accomplished that way. she could be calling me every name in the book tonight, and 99 out of 100 times, she will wake in the morning and act like nothing ever happend talking all nice and cute and asking for favors and help with this that and the other. it can be quite confusing...
...and please dont get me started on the issue of sex!
again, thanks for the feedback.