hello, i am a college student and for my summer english class i was assigned to write a paper on how divorce affects children and would like to know first hand how it affects children!
It depends on the age, family stress, how the kid deals with stress, the parents, and so on.
I'll give you a good example. I have two girls the same age. Both went through divorce at the same time. One is mine and the other is my wifes. We both have custody now. My daughter internalizes everything my step-daughter does not. Mine was and is a missy divorce my wifes was easy and we get along with the X. My daughter has sever stress related issues and but the other adjusted just fine.
I am sure it affects them all in different ways. Mine uses it to get her way and to keep me feeling guilty so she can maintain control of the house. She is exhausted from running back and forth and has taken on many codependant behaviors due to her parents being unable to cope.
I both have children from divorce and am a child of divorce.
How does divorce affect kids? Let's see, way too many subjects to jump into here.
Personally the major one is the loss of trust. When kids learn are part of the betrayal of a parent, it really takes a while for a kid to realize that trust is something to behold.
Divorce offsets the balance of family. Mommy is with a new guy now, he seems nice... I've seen daddy with four different women in the last month. Talk about weird to a kid. Volatility hurts. Yes kids adjust but there is nothing more stable to a kid than their mom and dad in one house (that is when mom and dad love each other equally).
Confusion... I split my kid's time 50/50 with my ex and I find my kids always asking "are we here or at mom's tonight?"
From a parent's standpoint, I couldn't hug my kids hard enough because I don't want them to go... you know what that is... separation anxiety... I had it as a kid and I have it now. I just adore my kids and it really pains me to not have them around full time.
Children's psyche are screwed up with divorce... no one can convince me otherwise.
-------------------- That which does not kill me, makes me stronger
Previous
Index
Next
Threaded
Edit
Reply
Quote
