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abbysfv
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Is this unusual?
      #212995 - 06/18/08 10:42 PM (69.230.67.153)
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My stbx only has our daughter about 10% of the time. But he wants 50-50 legal rights when it comes to making decisions about her. When parents have equal rights it is unusual for one parent to have most of the physical custody? I'm starting to feel like this isn't fair.

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theanswerguy
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Re: Is this unusual? [Re: abbysfv]
      #213001 - 06/18/08 11:43 PM (205.188.117.143)
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My stbx only has our daughter about 10% of the time. But he wants 50-50 legal rights when it comes to making decisions about her. When parents have equal rights it is unusual for one parent to have most of the physical custody?

>>>>>>>>>> Yes . Legal & physical custody are separate issues . Most states will award joint legal custody in the absence of abuse or neglect . It provides both parents with the right to have input on issues that affect the child(ren),religion , medical care , etc .

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Jada
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Re: Is this unusual? [Re: abbysfv]
      #213031 - 06/19/08 07:55 AM (69.115.64.195)
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[quote]My stbx only has our daughter about 10% of the time. But he wants 50-50 legal rights when it comes to making decisions about her. When parents have equal rights it is unusual for one parent to have most of the physical custody? I'm starting to feel like this isn't fair. [/quote]

What he's talking about is joint legal, which is different than joint physical.

What joint legal means depends on your state. In my state, it means that my ex gets to give his input on major decisions, like surgery (in an emergency situation, either parent can make the choice and had better), whether the kids go to private school or public school, religion.


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mistake#2
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Re: Is this unusual? [Re: abbysfv]
      #213078 - 06/19/08 11:25 AM (167.127.163.143)
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What types of things is he asking for equal say in?

For me & 2nd ex, joint legal is a joke...I make the decisions for my children as ex doesn't bother to be involved. I do however provide the information to him as I receive it, so if he ever did want to discuss something or any alternatives then the option is there.
With 1st ex, I ask more of opinions and ideas as he will help research options.


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abbysfv
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Re: Is this unusual? [Re: mistake#2]
      #213114 - 06/19/08 12:54 PM (209.36.244.253)
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Yeah on the day to day stuff or concerning her education he doesn't want any involvement. I would like to change our will and trust for her. Don't want his dysfunctional family to get custody of her if we both pass on.

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mistake#2
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Re: Is this unusual? [Re: abbysfv]
      #213125 - 06/19/08 01:05 PM (167.127.163.143)
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[quote]Yeah on the day to day stuff or concerning her education he doesn't want any involvement. [/quote]

So what is he asking for equal say in? Is it really worth the argument? I assume (due to ex's un-involvement) that the only issue I would EVER have is if my child, god forbid, was ever on life support and we didn't agree on the next steps to take. Everything else is pretty much at my discretion.


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abbysfv
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Re: Is this unusual? [Re: mistake#2]
      #213150 - 06/19/08 02:14 PM (209.36.244.253)
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Yeah me too. Even if I moved away what's he going to do? I wouldn't do that but since there's no way in the world he would even consider having full custody it just comes down to issues that require a signature.

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