My wife and I have been married for 2 years now. She has been threatening divorce for over a year. I went to counseling, had trouble getting her to attend, but finally, she did. It was no help, however, as she just laughed at the advice.
There have been about five occasions where she lashed out at me violently. I've been shoved into a wall, punched, and had numerous objects thrown at me. Finally, within the last few weeks, I made the decision to divorce her. She agreed.
Now since I'm finally going through with it, she's hit the "honeymoon" stage per se. She's acting nice and it's really bothering me. I know deep down I want a divorce, but now she's just playing with my head. I told my family I was divorcing her, and they being traditional, I've been barraged with phone calls telling me not to. This situation is really frustrating and I don't know what to do. I know deep down that I want out, but I'm afraid of the repercussions. Any input on my situation would be wonderful.
You should be more afraid of what the repercussions would be if you waited 10 years and had children before you divorced...paying alimony and child support. Family doesn't always understand why we make the decisions that we do, because they aren't living our life with that person. You can either choose to explain, or choose not to and let them know that it is your choice to make. I had the same issue with my family when trying to divorce my first husband. He would go to their houses crying and they would call me saying that they didn't understand...I stopped the proceedings because I found out I was pregnant and couldn't take the stress. A few weeks after the baby was born, my mom stated to me "I don't know how you could stay married to that man, why didn't you go through with the divorce." Of course, this was after she saw with her own eyes his atrocious behavior and me exhausted because I was trying to support our family without his help...I was exasperated by that comment and let her know because I was pressured to stay married and couldn't do it without any mental support. A year later I finally found the courage to go through with it.
If she is abusing you, then you need to leave the marriage. Forget about anything your family says...find friends that can support you in your decision. And heed the NO CONTACT rule.
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