Divorce Support Forums: I could use some advice please...

I'm not sure how to start this, but I guess I have to say that I'm not on here to trash my wife. Becuase I'm very sure that my past mistakes are the reason that she is considering divorce. Not that she does not have a part in the failing of our marriage. We got married young (she was 19 I was 22) not long after we got married I joined the army and was apart from her for about 4 years out of the 5 years I was in, also we built some horrible habits in our marriage nothing was not said we Loved hard and fought even harder. Before I knew her I started looking at adult material and brought that into our marriage. The worst part is I lied to her about it for years. I was not man enough to tell her about it. Of course she found out. So between that and the fact (which sound like I'm blaming other thing for my actions) that the army has turned me into to a much less senstive guy than she used to know. All the stuff in my head that I'm dealing with from my time in Iraq is not helping becuase I feel like that is another thing I can not talk to her about. I feel like I can't talk to her about Iraq becuase I feel like she has already lost so much respect for me I don't know how she would handle all of it. Now of course there have been good times in the last 7 years; like our two wonderful boys that I'm so glad to be a dad to and would never give up for anyone or anything. I have been out of the house for going on 6 weeks now. She says that she wants a divorce but has not yet filed for one yet. I'm going to start going to a counsler. Hopfully they can help me make some smart decisions on how to handle this very sensitive situation. My wife and me are still able to talk to each other, almost even better than we did before. This has been a huge wake up call for me and I am willing to do anything I can to fix it but how do I even start and if I do will I just scare her off or if I give her space like she is asking for is that going to make things worse. I feel like if I give her space then I can't show her how sorry I am and I won't have a chance to fix it. But I fear smothering her even more. Of course there is alot more going on here than what I have told you on both sides good and bad but this is a big part of what I am dealing with. Could use some advice or any help. I know I screawed up royaly but I Love her with all my heart and would do anything to fix this and make her happy for the first time in our marriage.