Thank you for the words of encouragement. The past couple of weeks have been tough and busy. I changed the locks, all of my phone numbers, and had a security system installed in the house.

He was calling me constantly until the numbers changed and he is sending me e-mails. The e-mails all get sent to my lawyer. They range from I love you and I miss you to I hate and will make you pay all written within the same message sometimes. He also showed up one night at midnight and started ringing the doorbell. I was scared, but he left after a few rings.

The key for me is to make sure that I do not speak to him. There are things that I love about him, but they cannot be separated from the ugliness and I know that he will never change. He talked me out of divorce once before and it will not happen again.

Our first court date is on Nov 6th concerning temporary orders and we will take it from there.

feeling better one day at a time, one step at a time, and one moment at a time. I am finding that dealing with things in small pieces is a lot easier than trying to take it all in at once.