My X was just like this and all the effort you put into the relationship will not help.

If your like me you have a list of why it is your fault, I thought that if I was just kinder, more understanding, a better housekeeper, (insert your list here) he would be nicer.

I think that Saam has it right when talking about them being so terrible that you have to leave, then they are the poor dumped person. My X did this, he was abusive for years and in the end ended up cheating on me, the one thing that he knew I wouldn't take.

So because the outside world doesn't know the real them, they play on the pity they recieve for being the abandoned man.

I know it is your decision but man I would leave as soon as I could get myself out.

I think these kind of people put others down to feel superior, and he will never feel good enough about himself because he knows he is being a creep.

RUN