My 2 cents is go to dinner at a quiet place and talk turkey to her. Real talk. Tell her this is a make or break discussion and if she doesn't want to listen carefully to what you have to say then this dinner and marriage is over. Hopefully she will choose to listen and talk.

Make notes ahead of time and discuss your feelings and how you feel about the marriage. Suggest councilling again. Tell her the truth - you are unhappy and thinking of filing for divorce - and that you are serious. I am guessing that you have lost comunication with her / between you. It has to be re-established or else your marriage is toast. Make sure she understands that.

Then give it a few days. She will either come to you to talk or she will blow you off as this discussion wasn't that important. You'll have your answer.

I hope she chooses to talk / work with you.