OMG - everything you just described, except for the children is what I feel like I'm suffering through now. My husband is ex-military and everytime he's been abusive with me I've threatened to call the police but I never have...he tells me that's the end.

Now what the heck is wrong with me that I will stay with someone who treats me like crap, but tells me he loves me?

I don't understand how I can be so mixed up inside?