When you go to the anger management classes, pay close attention. You will find out things to change about yourself and also characteristics to look for (or look OUT for) in your next relationship.

Some people find that the volatile way of life is really interesting and fun. I know you don't think that way now, when things have come to a head, but here's the problem, too many women who have gotten used to living with all the uproar will crave stability, find a stable relationship and then get bored with it FAST. The reason is that even though they crave stability and safety and protection, they don't know the whole package comes with less emotional ups & downs... less fun as well as less upset.

If you do some real soul searching during the classes and examine that things you do & don't like, figure out the characteristics that you would find fun and how to distinguish them from the dangerous characteristics, you'll have a better chance of finding someone for your next relationship that you can have fun times with, where it won't have such a likelihood of turning bad.

Think of emotions like a pendulum. If you swing really high on the up side, you'll also swing really high on the down side. Evening it out is not necessarily an option, becasue you will find it boring to live with highs that are not so high. The way to solve it, the right option... is to figure out things to substitute for your LOW swing behaviors. And to recognize a guy who also has those kinds of substitutions.

Maybe it's physical activity to exhaust yourself, to beat a punching bag rather than your loved ones, to take a jog and get away for a minute to clear your head and think. Looking for a GOOD substitute behavior for the high swing on the bad side is a smart idea... because if you don't have an advance plan on what to substitute, it's just too easy to find a NEW wrong thing to substitute for it... drinking, gambling, cheating... yep, they're not violent, but they'll just lead to a whole new set of problems... over-spending, refusing to talk, becoming manipulative... a LITTLE better but still not a good risk for long term happiness.

If you spend some time thinking this through, you'll find some things to do for yourself when you're in a high-energy bad mood, that will not be self-destructive. AND you'll figure out how to recognize a man who can swing with your high energy self and NOT have his own negative swings be destructive either!

Pay attention to the class and don't take it as a horrid chore that is going to interfere with your life, and you'll have a great life ahead of you!