wow i love what you wrote, and i promise that i have taken all that in consideration. YOu know i have got a lot better in this time it seems that now we might speak maybe 1 or 2 times a week, and if he want kids he has to call the house phone. I did find a lawyer that I can make payment with, and they are really helping me. I really needed to here what you wrote. but I know i have to realize one thing that it is not love, but really it hurts and I have to understand he do not want me.