if this is the first time you have seriously considered leaving him it is the first step in the right direction.

if you've thought about it before you might be ready.

i was a sahm since my oldest was born,
i too, stayed for many of the same reasons you mentioned.
much of our story is the same except i am now a great deal older.

when my oldest was the age of your children i was SO SO close to leaving...but then things would calm down...and i would stay.
i was scared because of $$ and all that.

years went by and now ive been a sahm forever,

AND

while i stayed for the kids....turns out...the
abuse i was working so hard to avoid, then working to keep
just between the grown ups,
ended up with one of my children being hurt by my stbx numberous times.

recently...now two years later, that same child
brought up those incidents....he is STILL
scared of his dad even though he is much better now that vistiations are shorter and he sees them only a bit so
they dont frustate him.

i wish wish WISH someone
YEARS ago would have told me to get out,
that i would make it!
that eventually i would HAVE to make!

who knows where i would be now.

get an attorney,
tell him your situation,
do NOT exaggerate, but dont play any thing down either.

you WILL make it!
for your own mental and physical well being you have to
be done.

And more importantly..do not wait until the
second time you children get caught in the crossfire.

the longer you wait the more scared you will get,
the more you might think this is 'normal'.

Please go while youre as young and strong as you will ever be.

Also!
be sure to delete your computer's history and cache or he may find this sight and post.

best of luck
and
if you can keep us posted.

taryn