Full agreement with Lair...whose words evidence that even when there is physical contact in words, phone calls, whatever- there does not have to be emotional contact. That is us to you or me.

My ex and I do have to talk about a great many details and I appreciate the barometer offered there as to how "tuned in " to him I am; how he can still push a button, create ripples in my sense of esteem or identity. It is painful but necessary to see, for me. As my bf said recently ,"he is going to treat you like a [censored]-sucker for all time". Knowing this to be true- it is up to me to disengage, whether we are talking all the time or not saying a word.

Devie