I hope I don't upset any of you newbies to the forum-I know your pain is great right now. But I need to ask for some input from the forum on this nagging question I have in my brain.

I am hoping the answers I get will help me to let go of this junk cluttering up my brain.

I can't help but feel like my life is over. I spent 16yrs of my life with one man, had a child and we were a family. I am too old to start over-no more children for me. I am too old to put up with other people's children-so no step parenting for me. I don't think marriage is a good idea for me-apparently I am just not cut out for it. Done it twice now-really don't want to add a third. But I wanted to be married, have a husband, be a mother and have a family-so now what?

All that is gone and over. There is this looming sadness about the loss of the past and no more of what I knew for my future. There is also sadness and guilt for what my son lost and will never have again.

If I was in my 20's or 30's I guess I would feel differently. Or maybe if my son was small I wouldn't mind more kids. But the overwhelming feeling is that it is over, gone, done-no more. No more husband or children or family life. Just me and 50% of my son.

So what do you look forward to for a future as far as having a relationship with someone again. Are we supposed to come to terms with this and put it in the past and forget about it.

What about all the times you face happily married people and families and it brings back those hopes and dreams you had.

I know there are good things in life after your kids are grown or you retire ect.. But now what?

I hope I made sense. I have been overwhelmed by everything in my life right now and I am trying to find a way to clear out my head and move forward feeling positive.