"Do judges rule for the mother in most cases other than demonstrated abuse by the mother?"

Joint custody is the norm these days. A father shooting for sole custody is typically seen as vengeful. It can backfire on you in that the court gives some credit in a battle for primary custodian to the most cooperative parent.

Your best strategy is to get a good lawyer, file first, remain in the marital home, care for your daughter and exercise as much patience with the situation as you can muster.