If you're entitled to collect unemployment and you prefer to work and try to earn your keep, you would find another job and not collect unemployment. Even if the job were not stellar, you'd keep it so maybe you could TRY to take care of your obligations. You'd not necessarily be happy to just live off the public dole and wait out the end of your unemployment entitlement before looking for something else.

I'd say he's a good guy trying to do the right thing and the agencies aren't yet caught up with the paperwork. The problem with putting a government beaurocracy in charge of collecting child support is that it never comes straight from him to you... it always goes through some process... they have to get his HR deparemtnt notified, he has to get his first paycheck, the HR department has to cut a separate check & send it to child support, child support has to cash it, count it, credit it to your ex's account & send a new check out to you. The states that have turned child support into a version of a check card or bank card have at least one of the steps cut out of the process, but it's NEVER as fast as if you were just collecting it directly from him.

Unfortunately for you, there are so many women out there who would collect directly from thier exes and insist that the payments never arrived, so most of the payers are now refusing to pay outside fo the agencies, to make certain they get credit for all the payments they make. Which means it's not like you're going to be able to get him to pay it to you directly.

Since you seem so suspicious of his motives, maybe ask a few more questions... what person would voluntarily resign a good paying job in order to take a lesser paying job with the knowledge that it would put them behind in child support and make their ex & all kinds of government agencies chase them down and nag about being behind?

Not many would do that. Some are hoping to hide from their ex, getting money under the table & such, but they don't take a new job with legit pay that's less than before JUST so they can find an excuse to reduce the child support by a few hundred $$. In most cases, a person who earns... oh, let's say $4000 a month... will pay $1000 a month in child support... this is not an accurate figure, because the truth is usually that peeople earn a whole lot MORE than that and pay a whole lot LESS... but for this example, we'll use numbers that will really benefit the receiver of support...

If he quit and started a job that only earned him $2000 a month, he'd be paying out maybe $500 a month in support... cut the pay in half, cut the support in half... it's never a formula quite as exact as that, but let's just say it is for the purpose of simplicity... Now... his HOURS are not cut, just the AMOUNT he's getting per hour.

HE STILL has to go to work every day at 8, still doesn't get home till 6, still doesn't have enough time in the week to see the kids for more than a few hours after work in the evenings. His rent hasn't gone down, he still eats, and he still needs a telephone, electricity, water. And to get a cut in his child support, he's taken $2000 less in pay. He started out with ... after child support... $3000 to live off of. He ends up with... after a cut in pay and a cut in child support... $1500 to live off of.

Why would he do that? Well, usually, he wouldn't. Every once in a while we hear of a guy who is willing to live in poverty and deprive his kids and dodge the law and build up an arrearage in order to see his ex angry... but most men do not do that. And the ones who do will do more than a single job change, will not usually take a job change that's easy to get... will usually try to find a way to get paid under the table so there's no record of their true income.

The whole country is having financial problems. Don't assume your ex is doing this for wrong reasons. He may sincerely be having financial problems. And even if there is some anger involved, some resentments of the support payments or whatever ... it's quite possible that your anger and suspicion and talking about him like a deadbeat is just making it worse. This is the father of your child and you need to find a way to be a cooperative co-parent. Isn't there some way you could consider NOT accusing him of wrongdoing and asking if there's anything you can do to help? Maybe you have a friend who could help him find a better job, or something. Or if you can't do that because no one you know is hiring because... well, financial hard times are all over.. .at least... not accusing him of evil motives?

Yes, an arrearage is bad, yes, it's horrible that you aren't getting alimony any more. But it's probably got nothing to do with him thinking he can mess with you and give your kids less by taking a voluntary cut in pay.