I don't find you cold hearted and I agree with your statement. It is my Ex's clothing/shoes that my child will not wear. You have under estimated the shopping ability of a woman with fashion sense and a Ross and TJ Maxx in her neighborhood! :O) My daughter wants to come back to residing w/us, there are several issues w/in my ex's household. The court will not consider her feelings, even at 11 yrs. I am asking for Joint Custody (60/40) at mediation. This allows my ex to maintain his need to control and forces my child and I to compromise but kind of get what we want. I have no issues w/ paying support, it's how he has went about it and his reasoning behind it. Can I pay 450$- $500 a month, no way, unless, I stop paying other bills and let lower bills go to collection, can I finagle, some how, 100 - 150$ a mos?, where there's a will there's a way, but my ex is going for my throat, being pro se, the cards are stacked against me. Thank you anyway for the response, it's appreciated.