My experience is that it doesn't matter too much if she's an infidel. Your unwillingness to go to counseling may actually hurt you more (yeah I know it's screwed up). If you make that much more, get your wallet out she is going to be compensated for that. I don't mean to sound negative, but I am living in your reality (wife cheated on me many times) looked the other way because I knew the emotional (for the kids) and financial devastation that would become my reality if I filed. My head was under the toilet for many years and when I did get a break from that position and walked on the eggshells all over the house, she tells me she wants out and I will be financially RUINED. When I was a good trained dog that only spoke when I was told to and did exactly as I was told.

From my experience, I wouldn't be so quick to abort unless you are sure you can't handle living with your new reality. The other reality is being flat broke(while you will probably have to get another job to now essentially pay for two homes) and your kids potentially being messed up for many years to come over this. Hopefully others have had better outcomes, my reality is I will have lived a better lifestyle while I was in college than I will live shortly.