Damn Raider, that sucks!

Sorry about all the shit. Before anything else let me say thank you for your service. You shouldn't have to pay for your service of your country with ruined credit and a lost family.

Maybe you could check with the VA and see if you might find some legal help there. Then check with the US Embassy about some help getting home to start addressing some of these issues. I don't know what the laws say in New Mexico about entering her apt but I would go on the assumption that you would be considered a trespasser. As soon as you file for divorce your attorney will be able to demand document production that would legally require her to produce all the documentation you have mentioned.

You have stumbled onto a great bunch of people here. While we may not be able to answer all your legal questions with authority, we can share with you our experience. That may be some help to you. Come here as often as you can and post your questions, frustrations, and pain. We have all either been through it or are going through it. You are not alone.

Good luck. Let us know of any progress.