I agree she is only a child. Unfortunately, she doesn't understand the concepts of doing laundry, cleaning, and running errands are just a normal part of every day life, and I know it's not her fault, but we don't want her to have it be Disney at both mom's and dad's house...that just doesn't prepare her for real life. I guess the advice I'm looking for isn't necessarily for me, but for her...how do you counteract or rather balance a girl's life who goes from her mom's house where the world revolves around her to our house where we live in this world called reality? She doesn't understand discipline, consequences to actions, etc. By age 11 I think it's ridiculous for a child to expect they can do things w/o consequences. How do you teach that when she's only here EOW and a few weeks in the summer, etc? We have tried for 8 years now, but her mom babies her and "saves her" and won't discipline her...case in point, SD is very bright, but she had 2 F's on her progress report. DH was not happy w/her...SD could care less, BM cared less...