My husband's ex wouldn't talk to him, only to me! They couldn't have a conversation without an argument, so she began asking to talk to me and her and I made all the arrangements. No, I did not like her, but I was glad we could at least be civil to each other.

Sounds like the new HB is a jerk. I hope he isn't trying to squeeze Dad out of the picture! Dad needs to stand up to him and he can do so and still be decent. His son's best interest should always come first, and I guess he is going to have to stand up to the HB for his son's sake.

I wish you luck. It can be done...but it is very tough. I always tried to remember that my stepchildren had a mother and it wasn't me. I let my husband make the decisions when they were with us. His son came to live with us when he was 13, and he was quite the handful. I don't know how we got through it all...but we did. He is now 33 and he treats me so well, even after his father and I separated. It is tough to be a step-mother. I am also a mother, and though it is challenging at times too, it is different when they are your own children.

I hope you and your husband to be are not afraid to ask for professional help dealing with these issues!