I agree with Saamrodi, living with parents isn't the worst thing in the world, and certainly no reason to keep your son's father from seeing him. My husband lived with his sister and her husband for awhile after his divorce because he couldn't afford his own place at first, but it didn't make him unworthy of seeing his kids. Hell, he and I live with my parents right now because I lost my job and I'm pregnant and we needed help. If my husband's ex said for that reason that the kids couldn't come over, she'd hear from ME, and she NEVER hears from me!

Unless he's a danger to your son, why shouldn't he get to see him often? Divorce doesn't make him less of a dad, and though I do think he should be supporting him financially, the courts aren't going to consider that for custody. And though it might make him look better, technically until there is a support order in place, he doesn't have to pay you child support (I'm not agreeing with this, just stating the facts).

Too often, dads get turned into visitors in their kids' lives, and that just sucks. And the kids suffer the most. Why shouldn't your son see his dad? If it's possible for the two of you to have equal time, why shouldn't you? I think it really sucks that the norm is still that mom gets custody and dad gets every other weekend. What if it was reversed and your STBX was trying to keep your son from you? Just something to think about.