hi, just wondering if you made any decisions yet. how old are your children? i have to admit, i also say "MY DAUGHTER" when i speak of OUR daughter. i have tried keeping this marriage together for many of the same reasons that it sounds like you have. my daughter is now 16, and she is totally messed up. i thought i was doing the right thing by staying here and unfortunately , after the damage is done, its too late. i am a mess, and she and i have both been in counseling. that might be your next course of action. you need to talk to a professional. if you cant afford it, there are many groups out there that meet regularly. i joined one at our local womens center. i am sooo glad i did, i am feeling soo much better. unlike your situation, my husband , after being together 20 years, decided he doesnt love me anymore and spends all his weekends at another womans house. i went thru a pretty rough time for awhile. however, i am feeling better and i know that the support group has helped me wonders. good luck and stay strong and stand your ground. you will not regret it in the end.