| Sarah1115 |
| (New) |
| 05/17/08 12:17 AM |
| 64.126.66.177 |
Deadbeat!
|
I thought my ex and I had a great arrangement... We did a self-divorce (no lawyers) about 3 years ago and decided to split time and expenses with our son 50-50. It worked for a while! Then my ex started getting serious with his current wife 2.5 years ago, and since has not been paying for our son's medical bills, daycare, prescriptions, or school expenses - to the tune of over $3000 (that's only his half!!!). He's strung me along over the years - promising to pay daycare (only to let it fall $400 behind) or promising to pay me $100/month (only lasted 1 month). Thankfully, my current husband is man enough to not bat an eyelash when it comes to financial support of our children! Now my X's new wife insists on being a part of all the financial decisions... I think she MAKES all the financial decisions because she told me - I have it in writing - that paying me back for my son's expenses is a very low priority for her... and since she entered the picture, I haven't been getting paid. Unfortunately, I make more money than my X does, so pursuing this through the court system would probably do nothing but earn me a monthly child support payment. Does anyone know - will the Kansas Child Support Enforcement help me recover the $3000 he owes? I don't want child support or change the parenting plan - I just want what is owed to me. If not - who can I count on? What should I do??? Note - I have documentation (statements and receipts) for all $3000 owed to me. Thank you!!!!!
| infinity386 |
| (Gold) |
| 05/17/08 01:51 AM |
| 74.12.72.54 |
Re: Deadbeat!
|
Questions...
1. Whats your current custody arrangement?
2. Does he pay child support or do you two split all your expenses 50/50?
| Jada |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/17/08 05:25 AM |
| 69.115.64.195 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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If there is a court order that says he has to pay half of the medical expenses and daycare costs you can check with them to see if they will collect them for you if you submit the receipts to them.
If it's in the court order, you can always file contempt of court against your ex compelling him to pay.
How much more do you make than him? If you are going by what the two of you were making at the time of divorce, that may no longer be accurate.
Anyway, if it isn't that much more than him, he may end up paying you child support if you are the one who is paying for health insurance and childcare costs. Those amounts are add-ons to child support.
Who has the tax exemption? And is it tied into him being current on all of his financial obligations to you? If not, I would file for a modification to add that to the court order. That alone may be an incentive to him to keep current.
Personally, I would consult with an attorney, s/he should know if the agency that collects child support will collect for the medical expenses.
| KGrow |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/17/08 10:15 AM |
| 24.8.144.220 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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"I make more money than my X does, so pursuing this through the court system would probably do nothing but earn me a monthly child support payment."
In most states, child support obligation is proportional to income (and inversely proportional to parenting time). It could be that the current state of affairs is a fair deal in this light.
I'd look at Jada's questions and make your own assessment of it. Don't fight if there's nothing to be gained.
| Samsung |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/17/08 10:40 AM |
| 75.163.17.247 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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Your ex is in the wrong, and you would prevail if you took court action. At the same time, he is within his right to ask for child support, so you would most likely pay many times over would you would get if you went to court. You can get an estimate of what child support would be at allaw.com.
| theanswerguy |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/17/08 11:37 AM |
| 205.188.117.143 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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Does anyone know - will the Kansas Child Support Enforcement help me recover the $3000 he owes? I don't want child support or change the parenting plan - I just want what is owed to me. If not - who can I count on? What should I do??? Note - I have documentation (statements and receipts) for all $3000 owed to me.
>>>>>>>>>> Kansas CSE will only enforce repayment for the debt after it has been reduced to a sum certain judgement ( you'll need to go to court to do this ) . A request for repayment is certain to trigger a modification request and with the larger income , you'll most likely end up owing him CS . The Kansas CS guidelines can be found here :
http://www.kscourts.org/Rules-procedures-forms/Child-Support-Guidelines/default.asp
| Sarah1115 |
| (New) |
| 05/17/08 11:51 PM |
| 64.126.66.177 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
|
Our current custody arrangement is that we split our son't time 50/50. We live close enough that we alternate days during the week and alternate weekends.
Neither of us pays child support. In lieu of that, we agreed to split expenses.
| Sarah1115 |
| (New) |
| 05/17/08 11:55 PM |
| 64.126.66.177 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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The divorce decree states that we agree to split costs for the care of our son.
I'm guessing I make roughly about $20-25K more than him annually.
Also, we alternate claiming our son every year at income tax time. I suppose I should be thankful that I got to claim our son during the year of the economic stimulus package!
| Determined_Dad |
| (Silver) |
| 05/19/08 11:20 AM |
| 64.90.25.125 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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Unfortunally, the only way to resolve your issue would be to take it to court. If he's not voluntarily giving you the money based on your agreement, then there's no other option.
However, it sounds like you have been getting the better side of the deal anyways. Basically, if you are making $25,000 more than him, and custody is 50/50, then you would owe child support. In order for your child to benifit from the income that both parents make in an income share model, then you would be entitled to pay him money. Not only would you have to pay him, but he would no longer be entitled to pay half. But instead, only a % based on yours/his total income. You may be better off eating the $3,000 as it appears you'd by much more than that in the long run. However, most people in this group would be quick to state - your getting out of paying child support that your child is entitled to - so your only hurting your child by going around the system.
Just for fun, I ran a senerio in the Tennessee Child Support worksheet, which may or may not be similar to Kansas's system, but if you made $65,000 and he made $40,000, and there were no child care expenses involved, then you would have to pay him $260 /month in child support.
| EZmark |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/19/08 08:59 PM |
| 76.110.222.166 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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He owes you $3000, you say. Guidelines say you owe him $260 monthly for 3 years =$ 9,360, and by % reduce the 3K by 20% to $2400. Balance you owe is $7,000 and his support gets reduced. I say you you go to court and get it modified to what is actually fair and best for your son since you are making more money and only have expenses 50% of the time. You can trade the $7,000 for paying the attorney fees. Judge can't vary the guidelines more than 5% without extraordinary circumstances. Miscalculations on the guidelines worksheet are straightforward basis for motion/modification, I'm surprised he hasn't filed yet he has an easy case.
I sense you're anger at the lack of true justice but it's a wash, IMO any "victory" would be hollow. There is no mommy card to play as it's just about numbers and you've singed off on everything else. CS is always modifiable.
You were obviously decent and level headed enough at one time to agree to shared custody and avoid a destructive court battle, you may have to swallow hard and do it again. and again.
It's a lot better than what I have to live with.
| Jada |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/19/08 09:07 PM |
| 69.115.64.195 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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[quote]Unfortunally, the only way to resolve your issue would be to take it to court. If he's not voluntarily giving you the money based on your agreement, then there's no other option.
However, it sounds like you have been getting the better side of the deal anyways. Basically, if you are making $25,000 more than him, and custody is 50/50, then you would owe child support. In order for your child to benifit from the income that both parents make in an income share model, then you would be entitled to pay him money. Not only would you have to pay him, but he would no longer be entitled to pay half. But instead, only a % based on yours/his total income. You may be better off eating the $3,000 as it appears you'd by much more than that in the long run. However, most people in this group would be quick to state - your getting out of paying child support that your child is entitled to - so your only hurting your child by going around the system.
Just for fun, I ran a senerio in the Tennessee Child Support worksheet, which may or may not be similar to Kansas's system, but if you made $65,000 and he made $40,000, and there were no child care expenses involved, then you would have to pay him $260 /month in child support. [/quote]
In income share models, they usually add on for childcare and health insurance. If she is the one providing health insurance, he could very well end up paying her child support. Or it would be a wash with the childcare and health insurance. Which would then leave the medical expenses beyond what health insurance covers and the extracurricular activities. He could probably get to where is paid in proportion to income, but he would still be liable for what he hasn't paid. And if she can get the tax exemptions tied into his being current on his financial obligations, she would probably find it worth it to go to court.
And something is better than nothing.
| Jada |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/19/08 09:10 PM |
| 69.115.64.195 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
|
You said:
He owes you $3000, you say. Guidelines say you owe him $260 monthly for 3 years =$ 9,360, and by % reduce the 3K by 20% to $2400. Balance you owe is $7,000 and his support gets reduced.
My response:
Actually, she doesn't owe him anything. They BOTH agreed to handle it the way it is in the court order (with no child support being ordered at all). He is reneging.
You make it sound like she is in arrears when she is not. In anyway, shape or form. The father, on the other hand, IS in arrears on his financial obligations to his child.
Why am I not surprised you are defending his actions?
| theanswerguy |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/19/08 11:54 PM |
| 64.12.117.143 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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Actually, she doesn't owe him anything. They BOTH agreed to handle it the way it is in the court order (with no child support being ordered at all). He is reneging.
>>>>>>>>>>> Do you live in the real world ? An attempt to enforce is sure to be met with a request for modification , especially if she earns more .
You make it sound like she is in arrears when she is not. In anyway, shape or form. The father, on the other hand, IS in arrears on his financial obligations to his child.
>>>>>>>>>> You always insist on "guideline support " , via guidelines she may be the " deadbeat " .
| Jada |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/20/08 06:32 AM |
| 69.115.64.195 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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You said:
>>>>>>>>>>> Do you live in the real world ?
My response:
Yes, I do. But I do wonder about you.
You said:
An attempt to enforce is sure to be met with a request for modification , especially if she earns more .
My response:
You really do need a reading comprehension course. She may or may not pay child support, depending on who provides the health insurance. She is paying the childcare costs (including his portion as he is a deadbeat who refuses to honor his financial obligations), those two alone may be enough that she doesn't have to pay child support. It would be a wash. Of course, as I suggested, she should consult with an attorney in her area and find out exactly where she stands.
You said:
>>>>>>>>>> You always insist on "guideline support " , via guidelines she may be the " deadbeat " .
My response:
Actually, she isn't the deadbeat as BOTH parties agreed to no child support. BOTH parties agreed to handle the expenses the way it is in the court order. Guidelines do allow voluntary deviations from it. BOTH parties here agreed to do just that.
And now one of them is reneging. In this case, it is the father. He's the one who is shirking his responsibilities.
Of course, it would take reading comprehension to be able to understand that.
| theanswerguy |
| (Platinum) |
| 05/23/08 07:55 AM |
| 64.12.117.143 |
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Re: Deadbeat!
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You really do need a reading comprehension course.
>>>>>>>> Funny , I think I've proven who has a problem with reading comprehension .
She may or may not pay child support, depending on who provides the health insurance. She is paying the childcare costs (including his portion as he is a deadbeat who refuses to honor his financial obligations), those two alone may be enough that she doesn't have to pay child support. It would be a wash. Of course, as I suggested, she should consult with an attorney in her area and find out exactly where she stands.
>>>>>>>> You forget the alternative , that HE's paying insurance costs and she will have to pay a butt-load of CS until the child is emancipated .
Actually, she isn't the deadbeat as BOTH parties agreed to no child support. BOTH parties agreed to handle the expenses the way it is in the court order. Guidelines do allow voluntary deviations from it. BOTH parties here agreed to do just that.
>>>>>>>>> CS is ALWAYS modifiable . The $3000 she's owed may be nothing compared to the amount she could owe him if he insists on guideline support .