Divorce Support Forums: How and where to get help for...

My wife filed for divorce, we have two young children and she changed her whole personality. It all started after her mother past and got worse after our second one was born. She even blew up one evening and I was falsely accused of domestic violence. We even had gone marriage counseling but she never opened - up because she was afraid that "they" would use anything she would say against her. How odd...Her family has a history of depressions and after now almost three years I can see a pattern and would like to know if I can get help somewhere for her, for us. She has changed a lot, kidnapped our two young children and left state last year telling every one lies about what really is going on. We have been in marriage counseling where I did find out that she is having a depression. I love her very much and have taken a whole lot from her mood swings and lies. She never opens up to me, doesn't communicate, is a total control freak, and hates confrontations. How can one find help? She suddenly filled for divorce after I supposedly said something wrong in her eyes. She broke off all contact and I only received a letter from her lawyer wanting a divorce. I don't know how she can afford the lawyer she has nor do I have money of do I want a divorce. She has been mentally abusive to our children, which only now start to understand and has done some other things that could have resulted in the death of our youngest one at the time because she left the care of our two little once with someone not aware of the youngest allergy problem while attempting to steal my vehicle from private (work) property. She has a serious problem and in my eyes is a ticking time bomb. I have tried to tell the DHHR, CPS and Seneca health what is going on but they have done nothing. Our oldest is a daddies child, and she wants to be with me, the few times we did talk the first thing she says is "daddy I want to come to you .. " Is there no way one can demand a psychological research performed by a professional health care worker to see what is going on? The strange thing is I know she still loves me but to not loose 'face ' against her relatives whom she has lied to so badly she keeps on going the path of lies. Who has any suggestion(s). There was a hearing last week which I attended by phone since I'm abroad and was told that I had 30 days to find a lawyer. They will send some sort of form with questions but I feel I don't stand a chance, first of all she has been spreading too many lies around, is using a case against me that should not be, I am a MAN and thus already convicted of wrong doing, the law of being innocent until proven guilty does not seem to go in this state (WV) plus I am a working poor class so no money no justice. I have wanted her to see a shrink but she took our children and left me all alone several times. I feel as I am an episode of the Dr. Phil show. I have not been mean at all or vindictive, nor mad or angry, that is just not me. I have always gone with the flow and then everything was fine but when ever I answered her a question other then what she wanted to hear I was all that is bad and more, as disrespectful, belittling her, I was suddenly the controlling person etc etc all things she does were mirrored on to me. I know she has a 'past' and I knew that things might pop up in the future but this is way too much. She is the baby of the family, has NEVER been 100% independent, always had other relatives clean up her mess behind her, she can be all smiles towards the outside world and mind you she looks beautiful, that I always told her even though she has low self esteem. I love this woman and she knows it, yet she chosen her relatives above our family, what am I to do? Yes I am hurt badly, but I can't stop loving her. I miss them everyday but she seems to listen only to those that don't know nothing, I have lived with her for almost seven years day in day out. She has changed so much for the worse and the hearing was a BAD play to say the least. I am asking for HELP, for all four of us. anyone??