jmraa
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Reged: 07/17/07
Posts: 5
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I was wondering if anyone knows if I can reopen a divorec file once it has been dismissed? I gave him another chance and it was a BIG mistake. I would love some help Thanks
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kent
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Reged: 06/13/07
Posts: 2968
Loc: a melted glacier
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Did you work through a lawyer? HOw long ago did you drop the file to give him another chance?
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Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
Dr. Seuss
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jmraa
New
Reged: 07/17/07
Posts: 5
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I filed for divorce in February and we were separated until May. It was at that point that I allowed him to convince me to cancel the divorce.
Yes, I did have an attorney. She strongly advised against doing this saying that it would be much better to put it on administrative hold instead. But, she did say that she thought it might be possible that the courts would reopen it. I am thinking that that is what I need to do.
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kent
Platinum
Reged: 06/13/07
Posts: 2968
Loc: a melted glacier
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It would seem that you could likely get it reopened. IF NOT - ask you lawyer :
1- can the same documents be used with a different date for a new filing?
2- if not how long will it take to create the new ones (it would seem that it should not take as long).
Sorry I do not have a magic answer. Wil the STBX be willing to agree to the same terms that were in the FEB documents?
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Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
Dr. Seuss
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jmraa
New
Reged: 07/17/07
Posts: 5
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You know my husband would not be agreeable to anything. I am dealing with someone who is very controlling (ie..money, time spent apart, where I go, etc) and the list goes on. I knew in my heart that he was just playing the part until he could weasel his way back in and he did a damn fine job, but I can't do this anymore. I am really scared too, because I am a stay at home mom, totally dependant on him. He has been telling lately that there was no way I was going to win any of the motions that I filed and that he and his attorney were going to destroy me. Iknow that it is just a scare tactic, but sometimes it is hard to believe otherwise.
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kent
Platinum
Reged: 06/13/07
Posts: 2968
Loc: a melted glacier
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Don't fall for the scare tactics. You need to do what is best for you.
As a stay at home mom - look for options out there job wise that will allow you to be independent AND be there for your kids (how old BTW).
When my folks got divorced - my mom looked at day care, owning a pet store and real estate. She went into real estate. With a teenage son at home (me) she wanted to be able to be at home when I got home, and something where I could help. ONe of my chores was cooking for her realator opens.
I know it is scary, but you do have options.
Are you in counseling? Check out Chrysalis. They are a GREAT place for women and kids (esp. if there is ANY form of abuse). They saved my mom and me.
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Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
Dr. Seuss
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jmraa
New
Reged: 07/17/07
Posts: 5
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Thanks for your support. I will start really looking into my options. I feel like I gave him another chance and it didn't work, so now I can make this decision knowing that I did all I could do. But it is scary, I have four children ranging from 3 to 10. It scares me to death that I could end up losing custody of them, which he tells me all the time, because I am an unfit mother you know. Not. I ask myself if I want to be like his mom and be in this same position in 30 years and I do not. I know there has to be a better life out there than this. No one should have to live like this.
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kent
Platinum
Reged: 06/13/07
Posts: 2968
Loc: a melted glacier
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No nobody should have to live like that. Check your options. Get some counseling. It sounds like from the little you have said - that Chrysalis could be an option :
Chrysalis
4432 Chicago Avenue South
Minneapolis, MN 55407
612-871-0118
www.chrysaliswomen.org
I would also suggest making some posts on the general forum boards up above. You will likely get more answers and more support. THese pages have been a real insentive for me to heal. They have helped me a great deal.
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Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
Dr. Seuss
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