WhatNext
Platinum
Reged: 10/11/06
Posts: 218
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I'll try to make this as short as possible.
My wife left me June 06. We were together 13 years and married 5 when she left. We got married in may 2001 and live in New York. We are still married so I guess in the courts eyes married 6 years. I wanted to work things out she did not. She moved out and got her own apartment.
In March 2000 (before I got married) with gift money from my elderly father I purchased a house from my sister and my father gave gift money to my sister to purchase a house for her family and him to move into because he could not longer live alone.
I never put my wife on the deed and the house is in my name only. All the utilities are in my name and there were no improvements made to the house to increase it's value. The only thing my wife ever had to pay for was the groceries and the cable bill(in my name also) I paid for everything else.
My wife did nothing to move our divorce forward so a month ago with advice from a lawyer I had here served with divorce papers citing constructive abandonment. Her lawyer has now sent my lawyer papers saying that she is charging ME with constructive abandonment and that I kicked her out of the house when she knows damn well that is not how it went down. I begged her to try and work things out and she refused and left.
She is asking for equal distribution of all marital property but did not list what that is. The ONLY thing she ever contributed to the house is she purchased a new oven, refrigerator and a BBQ. The total for all these items is around $1300.00 but she got around 4 years use out of each.
I have all the documentation on how and when the house was obtained with gift money before I got married. Also she makes more money than I do and is asking for spousal support and that I pay her lawyer fees.
From what I have read and what my lawyer has said is a judge will say my house is pre-marital property and she can not touch it. My fear is that somehow a judge will sympathize
with her for some reason and not call my house pre-marital property. Can a judge change the law as he or she sees fit? I have no problem paying her for the appliances but I have a major fear about the house. With her now saying I kicked her out and her refusing to speak to me now I do not know what to think. Is my house safe? Can a judge still give her half of it with all the proof I have about how and when it was purchased? Or would the judge have to follow the law on what is considered pre-marital property?
Thank you for opinion and help.
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theanswerguy
Platinum
Reged: 04/12/07
Posts: 2179
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[quote]I'll try to make this as short as possible.
My wife left me June 06. We were together 13 years and married 5 when she left. We got married in may 2001 and live in New York. We are still married so I guess in the courts eyes married 6 years. I wanted to work things out she did not. She moved out and got her own apartment.
In March 2000 (before I got married) with gift money from my elderly father I purchased a house from my sister and my father gave gift money to my sister to purchase a house for her family and him to move into because he could not longer live alone.
I never put my wife on the deed and the house is in my name only. All the utilities are in my name and there were no improvements made to the house to increase it's value. The only thing my wife ever had to pay for was the groceries and the cable bill(in my name also) I paid for everything else.
>>>>>>>Property acquired by inheritance, gifts from third persons, compensation for personal injuries and property acquired after the start of a divorce action are considered separate property and is not subject to equitable distribution . Her only claim may be to any increase in equity DURING the marriage .
My wife did nothing to move our divorce forward so a month ago with advice from a lawyer I had here served with divorce papers citing constructive abandonment. Her lawyer has now sent my lawyer papers saying that she is charging ME with constructive abandonment and that I kicked her out of the house when she knows damn well that is not how it went down. I begged her to try and work things out and she refused and left.
>>>>>>>>>>>>> It's a common tactic , she had to file a countercomplaint to your complaint .
She is asking for equal distribution of all marital property but did not list what that is. The ONLY thing she ever contributed to the house is she purchased a new oven, refrigerator and a BBQ. The total for all these items is around $1300.00 but she got around 4 years use out of each.
>>>>>>>>>>>Each party will be required to fill out financial disclosure forms .
I have all the documentation on how and when the house was obtained with gift money before I got married.
>>>>>>>>>>> Then it's your separate property .
Also she makes more money than I do and is asking for spousal support and that I pay her lawyer fees.
>>>>>>>>>>>>> She can ask for whatever she likes . Why aren't you asking for the same ? Spousal support is EXTREMELY unlikely if she already makes more than you . Either party can be assigned legal fees but it's usually the one with more money or the one who delays the divorce proceedings that pays .
From what I have read and what my lawyer has said is a judge will say my house is pre-marital property and she can not touch it. My fear is that somehow a judge will sympathize with her for some reason and not call my house pre-marital property. Can a judge change the law as he or she sees fit?
>>>>>>>>>>>>> No .
I have no problem paying her for the appliances but I have a major fear about the house. With her now saying I kicked her out and her refusing to speak to me now I do not know what to think. Is my house safe? Can a judge still give her half of it with all the proof I have about how and when it was purchased? Or would the judge have to follow the law on what is considered pre-marital property?
>>>>>>>>>>>>> Stop worrying .
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Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what's right. Isaac Asimov
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gigi
Platinum
Reged: 11/06/06
Posts: 5041
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No one can ever make any absolute promises with the law (heck, OJ was acquitted, remember?)... but from what you've told us, it appears you have no cause for worry. Her filing a response & asking for stuff is just the form for getting it started, not necessarily anything that's going to happen. If she really makes more than you, then why aren't YOU asking for alimony? That kind of worries me, like that maybe you have an income source that means you don't "make" as much as she does but you may GET much more... like some people have businesses where they keep their earned income really tiny and keep the assets in the business, but that doesn't mean you're safe, if that's the way it's gone. But otherwise, if you are TRULY not earning much of a living, got your house from money given to you by your dad (and the marriage never had to pay a mortgage payment), then it's probably yours (most likely, but no one can ever make an absolute promise in the law)... and alimony is not something you need to worry about.
By the way, the length of marriage isn't what most states would call long term anyways... and if she's been doing fine on her own for the past year of separation without alimony then it's highly unlikely that the judge will order any EVEN IF you'd been married for years & years. If you've not been helping her out with money from time to time, she's not had to open a line of credit just to get living expenses, etc., and she's been doing OK for a year, then she doesn't need alimony, so they probably won't give it to her.
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WhatNext
Platinum
Reged: 10/11/06
Posts: 218
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[quote]
>>>>>>>Property acquired by inheritance, gifts from third persons, compensation for personal injuries and property acquired after the start of a divorce action are considered separate property and is not subject to equitable distribution . Her only claim may be to any increase in equity DURING the marriage .
[/quote]
Thank you very much for your reply.
I'm sorry but what exactly does "equity" mean? What I think it mean is the value increase since I have owned this house?
I got the house VERY cheap because I got it from my sister and my father was giving me all the money for it. I got the house for $70,000.00 in 2000 and now it's worth around $250,000.00. Does this mean she can possibly get half of $180,000.00? And if yes why would this only maybe happen?
Thank you.
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WhatNext
Platinum
Reged: 10/11/06
Posts: 218
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[quote} If she really makes more than you, then why aren't YOU asking for alimony?
My lawyer asked me the same thing and I told him because that would just prolong things and I want to put this all behind me ASAP. It's really in my brain just way too much. I just to move on with my life. I don't want ANYTHING from her except to be out of my life completely.
That kind of worries me, like that maybe you have an income source that means you don't "make" as much as she does but you may GET much more.
No nothing like that. She makes around $17.00 per hour and I m make $12.00 an hour at a job I started last week. Before that I was unemployed for 7 months because the previous company I worked for 10 years closed down when sold. Everyone was let go.
If you've not been helping her out with money from time to time, she's not had to open a line of credit just to get living expenses, etc., and she's been doing OK for a year, then she doesn't need alimony, so they probably won't give it to her. [/quote]
I think what is happening is that at first she was all excited about getting her own place that she didn't realize just how hard it is out there on your own. Now that 15 months have passed she is starting to really struggle with her bills. Her job really owns he ass now.
Thank you for your reply.
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theanswerguy
Platinum
Reged: 04/12/07
Posts: 2179
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Thank you very much for your reply.
I'm sorry but what exactly does "equity" mean? What I think it mean is the value increase since I have owned this house?
>>>>>>>>>>> Yes.
I got the house VERY cheap because I got it from my sister and my father was giving me all the money for it. I got the house for $70,000.00 in 2000 and now it's worth around $250,000.00. Does this mean she can possibly get half of $180,000.00? And if yes why would this only maybe happen?
>>>>>>>>>>>If she can prove any of the increase in value was due to her active participation , she would be entitled to an equitable share which can be anywhere from 0-100% . It's possible a judge could order her a nominal amount .
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Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what's right. Isaac Asimov
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theanswerguy
Platinum
Reged: 04/12/07
Posts: 2179
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[quote][quote} If she really makes more than you, then why aren't YOU asking for alimony?
My lawyer asked me the same thing and I told him because that would just prolong things and I want to put this all behind me ASAP. It's really in my brain just way too much. I just to move on with my life. I don't want ANYTHING from her except to be out of my life completely.
>>>>>>>>>>>She's much more likely to settle quickly if there's a chance she'll have to pay maintenance or legal fees . You have separate property ( the house ) and that CAN be a factor in the distribution of other marital property and the risk of spousal support .
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Never let your sense of morals get in the way of doing what's right. Isaac Asimov
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Jada
Platinum
Reged: 06/02/07
Posts: 3314
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[quote][quote]
>>>>>>>Property acquired by inheritance, gifts from third persons, compensation for personal injuries and property acquired after the start of a divorce action are considered separate property and is not subject to equitable distribution . Her only claim may be to any increase in equity DURING the marriage .
[/quote]
Thank you very much for your reply.
I'm sorry but what exactly does "equity" mean? What I think it mean is the value increase since I have owned this house?
I got the house VERY cheap because I got it from my sister and my father was giving me all the money for it. I got the house for $70,000.00 in 2000 and now it's worth around $250,000.00. Does this mean she can possibly get half of $180,000.00? And if yes why would this only maybe happen?
Thank you. [/quote]
Did you pay outright for the house or did you put a down payment and get a mortgage?
If it is the latter, she has a very good argument for getting half of the increase in equity that occured during the marriage.
If it is the former, you may be able to make an argument that she shouldn't get half of the increase equity.
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WhatNext
Platinum
Reged: 10/11/06
Posts: 218
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[quote]
>>>>>>>>>>>If she can prove any of the increase in value was due to her active participation , she would be entitled to an equitable share which can be anywhere from 0-100% . It's possible a judge could order her a nominal amount . [/quote]
As far as I can tell she has done nothing to increase the value of the house. Nothing has been done to it at all. Like I said the ONLY thing she ever did was buy an oven, refrigerator and BBQ that's it. I am willing to give her the money for these so she will leave me alone.
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WhatNext
Platinum
Reged: 10/11/06
Posts: 218
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[quote]
>>>>>>>>>>>She's much more likely to settle quickly if there's a chance she'll have to pay maintenance or legal fees . You have separate property ( the house ) and that CAN be a factor in the distribution of other marital property and the risk of spousal support . [/quote]
I am not really sure what you mean here. The only marital property is the appliances I listed. Because I own the house outright this could mean I may have to give her other items that she would call marital property? Even all the furniture was purchased by me or gifts from my family. When she moved in with me all she had was a duffel bag of her clothes that's it. And are you also saying because I own the house this may mean I may have to pay her support? Even though she makes more money than I do? Thanks for your help.
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