randy225
New
Reged: 01/16/08
Posts: 6
Loc: Colorado
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My wife and I have agreed that a divorce is in our best interests after 12 years together. 3 kids, all under 10, no huge debts, but we live paycheck to paycheck. She has been a stay at home mom or part time earner most of our marriage. We just signed a one year lease on a rental house. The plan is to save as much as possible during that time and have her get things in order so she can move out after the lease is up, if not sooner. In the meantime, we will have separate bedrooms, and we have agreed to not tell the kids yet.
My question is this....should we go ahead and file now? We are both committed to being civil, and there are no huge issues that have not already been dealt with. We are politely and courteously figuring out property division, parenting time, etc, but I wonder if we get divorced while we still live together if I would have to pay her child support? It doesn't make sense to me that I would, but we are talking about the law, here. We are in Colorado.
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Look ahead to a bright future not yet written.
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kota1967
Platinum
Reged: 01/26/06
Posts: 1480
Loc: New England
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Randy: I think if you make it legal you will have to pay the child support unless you can get it waved till a certain date...say the day the lease ends...I am not sure...what if on of you start to date during this year...it will be hard to bring someone home...and the kids will figure it out believe me...mine were young and they figured it out...at least they knew things were "different"...I wish you the best and I hope that maybe you can work things out and not get divorced...the kids would appreciate that...(:
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randy225
New
Reged: 01/16/08
Posts: 6
Loc: Colorado
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Thanks, Kota, for the response...
I am really trying to keep this civil, but it is a lot of work sometimes to hold my tongue when she's home. At this point, working things out is no longer an option. We(I) have been trying that for over two years. She is miserable being my wife and not having her own independant life, so I finally told her it is enough.
I know the kids will see a difference, and we feel very strongly that we want to impact them as little as is possible (nice thought, I know!). I have decided that the paperwork needs to be filed to protect us both, and that way if one of us does meet someone...
I don't want to meet any women, though, at this point. I've had enough for a while!
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Look ahead to a bright future not yet written.
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kota1967
Platinum
Reged: 01/26/06
Posts: 1480
Loc: New England
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Randy: just so you know we all say we "don't want to meet anyone else" until we do and then foget it...but initially you do need to focus on the kids...who will get primary custody...if she wants this independent lifestyle does that mean she doesn't want to be a mom anymore...just a part time mom? that does happen a lot...I hope for the kids sake you are both very involved and everything works out ok for you all...good luck...(:
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