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OutOfControl
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Reged: 03/04/08
Posts: 8
PAIN
      #184107 - 03/04/08 07:53 PM (99.146.101.54)
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my husband is 6'8" and about 290 lbs. He is an aweful person. He abuses everyone around him, even his own friends. His drug habit makes things 1000 times worse. He has beaten on my mother and myslef. He has attacked his own friends and the blames me for them not wanting to hang out with him. He has taken the best years of my life. When he had an affair with the [censored] across the street he moved out for two months and I got a RO. I knoew it was too soon but I dated 2 diff guys~ WOW what a world of difference between what I have been putting up with and what I should have in my life. Sometimes I think God is punishing me for something. There are no positive things in my life other than my Mom and Son who live with me. I am desperate for relief. I want out but I cannot start that game again of cat and mouse. He is the kind of guy who will smash everything in the house if he thinks I am going to leave him. He has already "beaten" up the garage. He threatend to take a bat to my car so I called the police, they asked if his name was on the title, when he said yes they said there was nothing they could do. WTF? Sorry for ranting....I just really need professinal help.

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malone
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Reged: 12/30/07
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Re: PAIN [Re: OutOfControl]
      #184723 - 03/07/08 04:10 AM (125.239.53.228)
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Out of cotrol, you have a simple decision to make. I made it. And here's how I decided? I'm 42. Could I live with my husband for another 20 years? I answered this with complete honesty and realised that not only could I not do it, I figured I wouldn't live that long if I tried to do it anyway.

You are in a hellish situation. You have no choice but to LEAVE.

So here's what you do. Go to your nearest Women's Shelter and ask them to help you. Ask them how you leave a husband who is violent, abusive and threatening your life. Thy wil lhelp you make a plan and start again.

Leaving is the hardest thing you wil lever do in your life. But once you get htrough it, you will have peace and happiness. Go to your local women's shelter, involve the police when you are aready to leave and consult legal aid or a lawyer.

Good luck.


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Jada
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Reged: 06/02/07
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Re: PAIN [Re: OutOfControl]
      #184729 - 03/07/08 07:19 AM (69.115.64.195)
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What you need to get is out of there. If he smashes everything in the house, so what. It's just things. Things can be replaced.

Your life cannot. The next time that he assaults you, call the police. Get a domestic violence restraining order (be sure to include your son and mother in the restraining order and get exclusive possession of the house) AND press charges.

And don't back down. Let your son see that what his father is doing is wrong and that you can stand up to him and fight to protect both you and your son (and your mother, as well).

You need to get out for both you and your son's sake. Do you want your son to grow up to abuse his spouse? By staying, you are teaching him that abuse is okay.


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