Wrongly Accused
New
Reged: 03/27/08
Posts: 5
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Ok i left my wife about the second week of January. All i took was my clothes and personal stuff. I had been wanting to go to a marriage counsiler for the last year or so but she would never go. She has mental issues and she has a money spending fetish that almost ended my last two jobs. She will be on her medication for a while, everything is great, and then she stops taking it and everything goes to crap again. So anyway, a week after i left, she tried to kill herslf and almost succeded. After she was in the hospital for a week, my father almost died of an aneurysm and i was 3 hours away for about another week. After she got out of the hospital, i agreed to let my mother in law take our daughter and my wife back to the town they lived in, because at the time i trusted MIL. I had a lot of stuff that i need to deal with at the time and i didn't know what was going to appen with dad. MIL and i even signed a temporary agreement for custody, i was supposed to see my daughter every other weekend. Fast forward three weeks and i keep getting excuses why i can't see my daughter from MIL. After i demand to see her, MIL is avoiding all of my calls. I call my STBX, she says that they have been taking my daughter to a tharapist for "behavior problems", and that the therapist has reccomended that my daughter not see me because it could cause more stress, and i am being accused of spouse and child abuse. Pure BS. Fast forward another two weeks. I have filed for divorce, STBX has agreed to bring daughter for a visit for the weekend. MIL has gone crazy and has threatened to take daughter away on gounds of child abuse. I agree to let STBX stay at the house for the weekend(i know, stupid move, but we were getting along) even though i was not really comfortable with it. We had a good weekend, until sunday. She kept saying we could get back together, and begging and pleading, i made it crystal clear to her that we were not going to get back together. As she was leaving, we got into an argument, lo and behold, i get arrested and charged with assault. Now i am being attacked on every front. She is accusing me of spousal abuse, child abuse, child molestation, and cheating on her with men. She has posted rumors about me being gay all over the internet, to my family and all of our friends. I know now that MIL is an evil, manipulative pycho and she is pulling all of the string because they did the same thing when my STBX's sister got a divorce. All of these charges are bogus, in the 5 years we were together there was never any suspicion of any of this stuff, because it never happened. My question is, who has been through this stuff and what are my chances of walking away without getting pinned with a false charge? There is so much more to this story...
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alimonyman
New
Reged: 03/27/08
Posts: 9
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You obviously need a good - no - great lawyer in a hurry. Unfortunately, it seems that accusations of child/spousal abuse are presumed to be true, until you're proven innocent. I had a good friend, a forensic accountant, who had a crazy wife. She accused him of threatening her with a knife. I'm sure, as sure as anyone can be of anything these days, that this was pure BS. Anyway, he was immediately arrested, had to go to court, had a restraining order placed against him. When his wife came to her senses, she had to go to court to get the charges reversed. The police and courts seem to act first and ask questions later. Good luck.
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Wrongly Accused
New
Reged: 03/27/08
Posts: 5
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Fortunately, i have a good lawyer, i just need more money to pay him. What is ironic is he worked for my MIL when she was accusing sister's X of all this stuff. So he is miffed that he looked like a fool and they still owe him money for that case! But he knows thier gameplan, so he has kind of an edge.
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stoltz
Platinum
Reged: 01/29/07
Posts: 1478
Loc: Texas
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There is a book (whose name escapes me at the moment) written by a male divorce attorney in which he details things a wife can do to her husband pre-, during, and post-divorce to absolutely ruin him in almost every aspect due to the gender bias that exists in the Family Courts today. You seem like the person this author was writing about almost exactly.
The best advice I can give you would be to get educated - FAST! - on the divorce laws in this country and in your state, specifically. Also, try to find the nearest Father's/Men's Rights group to illicit advice and to get more resources for what you are about to experience (it'll probably be 10x worse than what you've already gone through). And, as alimonyman said, try to find a top-notch lawyer.
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jbar
Platinum
Reged: 12/16/06
Posts: 989
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There is a book (whose name escapes me at the moment) written by a male divorce attorney in which he details things a wife can do to her husband pre-, during, and post-divorce to absolutely ruin him in almost every aspect due to the gender bias that exists in the Family Courts today.
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Unless written as an expose' of how corrupt the family law sytem is, this really sounds "par for the course", based on my experience with typical, unethical, greedy divorce lawyers. I have gone on record many times here, expressing my disdain and spite for them.
BTW this reminds me of the story about Lincoln, that he was walking through a cemetery one day and saw a grave marker which said, "Here lies Tobias Tull, a lawyer and an honest man". Lincoln is said to have thought for a moment, and remarked, "Hmmm... must be two of them in that grave!"
If you remember the name of that book or the author, please PM me. Wouldn't want to get too many more gold diggers excited about their impending riches (I would get it from the library and not let the author have a penney)!
Edited by jbar (03/27/08 09:20 PM)
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