Divorce Support Forums: Me in WV, Him in TX -- Seeking Help

I relocated away from him given the circumstances and now I have wait one-year to even file papers for a divorce? I have been here in WV for since March 2007. Is there any way that I can seek help on speeding this case on given that he has lied throughout our relationship and marriage--even lied how many times he was married to me. He caused enormous amount of emotional pain. The following is a post that I have on a site. I found out so much about him/lies by speaking with his first x-wife! Emotional Pain/Money/Time, etc was wasted on this gentlemen.

His ENTIRE LIFE (LIES). EVERYTHING he may express may possibly be a LIE!!! (Spin Truths with Lies)

Currently: Married but Separated.

BIGGEST MISTAKE of MY LIFE, don’t let the following happen to YOU! I gave Scott ALL of MY BODY/HEART/MIND/SOUL, I truly “BELIEVED in HIM” and in “OUR VOWS”! I SHOULD HAVE listened to numerous family members & friends about him being a “USER”; they all saw the MANY “Red Flags.”

I felt foolish for not paying attention to that “Gut Feeling” and finding all this out way too late. Believe me I WISH someone (from his past) would have been looking out for me as I am looking out for YOU as "Scott's NEXT VICTIM". He is probably willing to relocate where-ever he can find her and/or him!

Tribulations with Scott were escalating very fast, matter-of-fact it took a Domestic Dispute call on 1.8.07 phoned in by me, two police officers escorted "HIM" out of the residence!

He ABANDONED/DESERTED ALL obligations (like his past—this time, me owing ALL debts, including credit). He Isolated & Stranded family (no car & no way to pay for Shelter/Utilities in an unfamiliar area to me, he locked bank accounts so I couldn't apply funds to pay for monthly expenses--my resources were also going into an account and I had currency from a family member in another account)!

The LIES that he has told are so compelling and he is VERY Manipulative! ALL Talk, No Action! During our time together, he did not even go to seek counseling—always held me responsible. (Now, I know why . . . the TRUTH would come out!). I believe in Psychology, it is referred as Mythomania. (PATHOLOGICAL LYING)?

He is an Attractive, Believable, Charming, and an ENDLESS INJURED INDIVIDUAL! In Every NEW relationship (COUNTLESS) he accuses his ex’s for HIS OWN BAD ACTIONS & BEHAVIORS. Everything was their fault, no Personal Responsibility. According to him, he was “ALWAYS a Good Husband or Mate throughout, they all left me!" Now I know why, Scott is MERELY searching for a Mommy Figure, Care-Taker and/or Nurse-Maid!

Vast Physical Health Problems??? He is the one who has countless illnesses especially declaring HEART, STROKE, and CANCER (hearsay is now 3 times). He CONTINUOUSLY seeks validation from the medical field, while over-medicating by using over-counter drugs/prescriptions for numerous illnesses. I believe in the Medical Field it is referred as "Munchausen Syndrome"?

I believe that he is a COWARD for the reason that he finds fault in everyone else so he doesn’t have to look himself. According to him, “You have serious problems and NOT ME”! He is Very SKILLFUL of REWORKING HIS LIFE so he can LIVE IN and WITH IT! “POOR ME SYNDROME!” Constantly in search of validation from mate or whomever at the time, it is a NEVER ending cycle!

He exhibits Childish Behaviors and is VERY High Maintenance! Plays games with your mind, VERY Emotionally, Mentally and Verbally Abusive. Becomes furious if you don’t pay enough ATTENTION to him, throws tantrums, isolates himself whenever he doesn’t get HIS way, withholds affection, etc.! (Laziness??? Emotionally as well as Physically).

To me; he just attains a relationship for HIMSELF only, VERY SELF-ABSORBED personality! “LOOK-at-ME”! I truly believe that he falls for the "IDEA of LOVE & not being “IN LOVE". True Commitment Issues, again everything for him only!

He even has a LONG LIST of jobs, while with me--4 in 1½ years! Doesn’t keep them, he uses “Bad Physical Health”, or “Not Feeling Good” as a justification for quitting. Always EXCUSES, so MANY of them!

Real Reason??? Let me see; Past Due Child Support Obligations, owing Banks/Loan Corporations, Federal Taxes, Social Security, etc. It is NOT the first time he has ABANDONED or DESERTED obligations!

HIS CAR was repossessed (again) for the reason that HE chose not to go to work for weeks (Incredible job/able to move up). Worked 2-months, then before that only 4-months at another great job (able to move up), then another working for only a few weeks before that and another one, while in between taking 5-7 weeks up to 4 months off doing nothing (Complaining & Whining, Internet [censored], Junk Food, Over-medicating, Reading, Video Games, Watching TV, etc.). Every time wanting me to ask MY family for assistance given HIS FAMILY doesn’t want ANYTHING to do with him! He OWES EVERYONE MONEY!

He doesn’t want to GROW UP and take responsibility for ANYTHING! Wants mate or whomever TO DO EVERYTHING for HIM! I mean EVERYTHING!

Explores NUMEROUS Online Dating and Sexual Sites seeking ADMIRATION, he CAN NOT COPE in life WITHOUT IT! I have even seen him "Google" his own name numerous times sometimes even within the same day. Seriously into Internet [censored]! Not just the Ordinary type (man/woman or woman/woman, etc.), it is NAUSEATING categories.

Utilized pet names Sweetie, Honey, etc.). “Used them..., don't have to remember names…so many of them."

Joking; he told me he had a history of being a Con-artist. I just disregarded, now I DO BELIEVE IT. Just recently FOUND OUT MANY TRUTHS regarding him!

Please TRUST me, it WILL cause NUMEROUS REGRETS! Don’t let the Attractiveness, Believable, and Charming Persona & his Cooking Abilities astonish you; eventually you will be VERY Disappointed! It begins FANTASTIC then in time the TRUE SCOTT COMES OUT!!! TRUTH ALWAYS finds away to emerge!!

At least one thing, it illustrated to my son “HOW NOT TO BE A PERSON like HIM!” Scott knew what he was doing . . . his deceitfulness! He has been engaging in this type of behavior way to long to change.

Question, just speculating: Are all Narcissistic’s Pathological Liars and/or are all Pathological Liars Narcissistic’s? I would like to hear from if anyone gone through this type of relationship or marriage!

FOOTNOTE: Within this “Blog” I am just demonstrating in MY OWN BELIEF what I and my children went through with Scott. The HEARTBREAKING phenomenon of all is: If Scott would have sought counseling, I would have BEEN THERE for HIM COMPLETELY, that is HOW MUCH I TRULY LOVED HIM!!! However, he NEVER WANTED to take the Initial step. Thank you for your time by reading this and Have a WONDERFUL Day or Night!!!