supportme
New
Reged: 04/30/08
Posts: 4
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I am currently seperated from my STBX and we have 2 children together. I am leaving him due to his drug usage and lying. I tried to not make the visitation an issue until he wrecked the family car with all 3 children in it due to an overdoes. After this occurance he fled for a few months. I got a rstraining order against him and he got one day a week with the kids and has to pay support. He is now refusing to pay and feels he should get the kids anytime he wants. This scares me to death when he has the kids. What are my rights when court ordred child support is not paid? His father also is supposed to pick the kids up and drop off, he doesnt want to get involved anymore so the kids suffer. I have so much guilt because the kids cry for their dad. Were do i start my divorce process with as little means to pay with, and just overwhelemed. Ineed advice.
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Jada
Platinum

Reged: 06/02/07
Posts: 3191
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If there is a court order for child support, you can file contempt of court charges if he isn't paying. I would ask that the support gets garnished from his wages.
And if there is a court order that states he only gets the kids one day a week (given his addiction, I hope it is supervised), then that is all he gets the kids. If he wants more, he's going to have to go to court to get it.
And he's going to have to prove that he's drug free. Was he tested for drug use at the time of the accident? If so, that is enough to get drug testing and supervised visits.
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supportme
New
Reged: 04/30/08
Posts: 4
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He wasnt tested and they didnt even search the car because we found prescription pills in the car. He keeps beating the system. My kids cry when they know its time to see him and they dont. Thats the worst part for me because they are suffering so much. I do need to have the state enforce the child supoport though. Its going to be a hard process. Thanks for the advice!
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ttina
Platinum
 
Reged: 02/28/08
Posts: 397
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Don't count on getting money just because it is ordered. My ex has pill/coke/mary jane issues.... he's now 10000.00 in arears. He does see his son regularly though. My advise.... live as if you can't count on him financially or emotionally.
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supportme
New
Reged: 04/30/08
Posts: 4
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I know that for the childrens sake, even if hes not paying support, you let him have them on his times? I mean like what is the limits until he has to start taking responsibility for them too. Do you let your ex take the kids anyways? Do you guys argue because he does owe back support. My ex really thinks he doesnt have to pay because they dont live with him. I guess hes fried ! lol
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ILMom
Silver
Reged: 12/03/07
Posts: 83
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My ex is a bipolar (off his meds) drug addict. After his 8th car accident in 3 years (thank God no kids were in the car) we are going back to court to get supervised visitation. He hasn't complied with the drug testing clause in the custody agreement (do you have something like this?) nor did he ever sign a privacy release so I could get the results of his drug tests (if he ever took one). The best thing I ever did was include that drug testing clause... it specifically says if he fails a test OR DOESN'T SHOW UP FOR ONE it is considered a failed test and he is to move to supervised visitation until he has three clean tests. And including the clause where he was mandated to sign a privacy release so I could get the results ensures that I can actually do something/know the results if he were to take a test.
It was his responsibility to initiate the tests and sign the release and he hasn't. After recent harassing calls and an 8th accident, I'm done with him and his promises to get the drug testing done. He's clearly wacko at the moment.
Didn't I get this divorce so his problems were no longer my problems? Then why do I feel like his problems continue to be my problems?
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