katyb66
New
Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 9
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I would hope if your credit card debt is behind $10,000 that it's because your children are not going w/out basic necessities however if your C/S is behind $10,000 most likely your children are going w/out basic necessities.
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EZmark
Platinum
Reged: 06/04/07
Posts: 292
Loc: Florida
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There can be perfectly legitimate reasons for being behind 10K in CC debt, custody battle, emergency, etc. There can be perfectly good reasons for being behind 10K in CS, accident, unemployment, etc. In all cases the payer should be responsiible enough to make the proper legal notifications but even that won't change the reality of the situation.
Speaking of reality, any CS who would let their child go without basic necessities (as you stated) because somebody else wasn't paying something should not be a CS. Your agenda is typically clear, use threats of jail and child's sufferring as a tool for $ from X. No surprise finding you here. Despicable.
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mistake#2
Platinum
Reged: 07/19/06
Posts: 3268
Loc: Florida
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[quote]There can be perfectly legitimate reasons for being behind 10K in CC debt, custody battle, emergency, etc. There can be perfectly good reasons for being behind 10K in CS, accident, unemployment, etc. In all cases the payer should be responsiible enough to make the proper legal notifications but even that won't change the reality of the situation.
Speaking of reality, any CS who would let their child go without basic necessities (as you stated) because somebody else wasn't paying something should not be a CS. Your agenda is typically clear, use threats of jail and child's sufferring as a tool for $ from X. No surprise finding you here. Despicable. [/quote]
Okay lets be fair here...how often do you hear NCP's that DON'T pay their child support obligation stating that the CP doesn't need their money or that the CP is just a money grubber that is out doing their nails or something. What does the NCP not paying REALLY mean for the CP? It generally means that the CP has to often tell their child no, they can't afford XYorZ and it often means that the CP has to work more hours which means less time with the child. Does it mean that the child goes without basic necessities? Usually not cause if a CP didn't provide even the basics then THEY could lose their children & possibly go to jail for neglect. Most CP's are going to work their butts off to provide (just as majority of NCP's are going to pay the child support obligation) for those that won't...whether that be a CP or an NCP, they both SUCK and should rot!
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katyb66
New
Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 9
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Speaking of reality, any CS who would let their child go without basic necessities (as you stated) because somebody else wasn't paying something should not be a CS. Your agenda is typically clear, use threats of jail and child's sufferring as a tool for $ from X. No surprise finding you here. Despicable.
The custodial parent asked what her options were, I did a simple google search and found that law. So what is the problem w/ me in this forum? You write as if you know me considering this is the first time I've posted in this forum so you must have me mistaken for someone else.
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katyb66
New
Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 9
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agree with ya mistake#2 as to how unrealistic that statement was as it being one being a reply to another unrealistic reply about children and credit card being of same worth.
Back to the original post, the parent states the ncp makes over $100,000/year and is over $15,000 in debt on c/s. The law is there to be used and should be used. Both parents are responsible for the kids not just one. Why should the other parent get off from paying their part of the child support, does the parent who has the child get to not pay for what is needed in the household or school, diapers etc just because they have other obligations? Nope because the parent who has the child is the one who has to witness that child going w/out. There's the difference.
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EZmark
Platinum
Reged: 06/04/07
Posts: 292
Loc: Florida
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Original poster is crying for more $. $he has the kids, sounds like his relationship with the kids is being strained (one has to wonder why?), $he doesn't mention herself working, but $he's received CS & alimony, and is married, and living off a new man, pity he forgot to put that clause in the MSA to end alimony upon remarriage or cohabitation. (Pay attention to that men, if $she cheats and shacks up with him it can save you alimony!).
He's unemployed and reported it and working as much as he can while looking for a job. $he thinks he's gotten away OK, so $he's angry and wants the ezmoney $he's thinks $he's entitled to, and to hurt him in any way too.
If she is working and contributing to support their kids and if he's really making 100K+ and not supporting his kids he'll be foolishly supporting attorneys instead, but it looks to me like another case of it's still not enough.
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mistake#2
Platinum
Reged: 07/19/06
Posts: 3268
Loc: Florida
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[quote]Original poster is crying for more $.
**I think she was stating that he isn't paying the court ordered support, not asking for even more...
$he has the kids, sounds like his relationship with the kids is being strained (one has to wonder why?),
**I don't think she stated anything beyond that he is behind in support and makes good money so she doesn't understand why...
$he doesn't mention herself working,
**No, she didn't mention herself working but probably assumed that everyone else would assume that she's supporting herself and fulfilling her obligation to her child, but we'd have to ask specifically if she's working to know for sure...
but $he's received CS & alimony,
**She didn't state anything about alimony, did I miss something there?
and is married, and living off a new man, pity he forgot to put that clause in the MSA to end alimony upon remarriage or cohabitation. (Pay attention to that men, if $she cheats and shacks up with him it can save you alimony!).
**She stated that HE WAS REMARRIED...unless it's in a post that I missed, she didn't state that she was re-married or cohabitating...nor do I remember seeing that she shacked up with some guy after cheating on her ex...again did I miss something there?
He's unemployed and reported it and working as much as he can while looking for a job.
**The poster said that he made something like $135,000 per year yet wasn't paying his child support obligation? Not that he was unemployed...
$he thinks he's gotten away OK, so $he's angry and wants the ezmoney $he's thinks $he's entitled to, and to hurt him in any way too.
If she is working and contributing to support their kids and if he's really making 100K+ and not supporting his kids he'll be foolishly supporting attorneys instead, but it looks to me like another case of it's still not enough. [/quote]
**It looks to me like it's more of a case of the NCP not wanting to pay for a child that they should be responsible for...and the CP is frustrated that NCP isn't responsible enough to put the children first so she's venting here and wondering if there is more that can be done.
Not every case is a NCP getting screwed out of time with the kids or nickel and dimed and used as an ATM...sometimes it's really about fulfilling a legal obligation to support the children by both parents that both parents were responsible for bringing into this world.
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justme1961
Gold
Reged: 03/11/08
Posts: 196
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Ezmark/Mistake #2
Some facts:
My ex is re-married (2nd time since our divorce).
I am also re-married.
I also work.
My children are teenagers, not babies.
My ex-husband was laid-off and he is working where he can while he looks for a job in his field. He could not collect unemployment right away because he got a severance package. (That is what he told me anyway).
Yes, I am supposed to receive alimony-a small amount each month.
No, I did not cheat-my ex-husband did (8 affairs during our marriage).
Mistake #2- Thank you for your understanding and objectivity.
Ezmark- Maybe you should read my post "Karma is Confusing" on the "Life After Divorce" forum. I am not a blood-sucking, money-hungry witch. You obviously feel scorned by your ex. Don't take it out on everyone else. An apology would be in order, but I will not hold my breath.
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katyb66
New
Reged: 06/01/08
Posts: 9
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a couple of things here JustMe, if he got a serverance(sp) pkg you should have been able to get a good chunk of your missing c/s payments out of this settlement and c/s is collected under Unemployment benefits. What is collected under unemployment benefits may not be the full amount you're suppose to collect but it will be a portion of it. Hope this helps.
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justme1961
Gold
Reged: 03/11/08
Posts: 196
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Hi Katy-
Ya, I know I should have received child support on his severance package. Our original divorce decree stated I would receive a % of all of his income (salary plus commissions). However, the court changed it to a set monthly amount based on his salary plus the % on his commissions. His company was sneaky (probably at his request) in the way they took the CS deduction. They took the monthly amount out of his last paycheck (conveniently there was not even enough to cover the court-ordered monthly payment)then they paid him his severance package.
He stated in court 2 weeks ago he used the money from the severance package to pay bills. And he also did the same with his 401k. We are still waiting for the court's decision.
It is all a moot point now and I will probably never see any of the money he owes me. He was arrested for his 4th DUI last week and for violating probation for a domestic assault charge on his wife from last fall (if he was good for one year the charges would have been dropped). His wife also filed a restraining order against him. He is currently living in our 2nd family room over the garage, as he had no one else to turn to and nowhere else to live. His next residence will, most likely, be jail.
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