mfergel
Platinum
Reged: 02/11/08
Posts: 1346
Loc: Richmond, VA
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I know I did this. Too many times I'd try to initiate and it was "It's time for sleep". If she had just once told me why she felt the way she did, then I think we could have worked together then on meeting each others needs.
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Here I am ladies.......come and get me. :-)
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germangirl631
Platinum
Reged: 04/04/08
Posts: 875
Loc: NJ
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My stbx would fall asleep downstairs in front of the TV, and then want to wake me up in the middle of the night for sex every time. As a mom working full-time, this is not something you can do repeatedly and still function the next day. My take was (and I told him this over and over) if you want to sleep with the TV, sleep with the TV. If you want to sleep with me, come up to bed when it's bedtime and not in the middle of the night just because you can't sleep. He still didn't get it. Could I have been any more clear? Who would want to have sex when the initiator clearly wasn't listening to their wishes and didn't seem to care at all about it?
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juliacinaz
Platinum
Reged: 02/03/08
Posts: 796
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Mine did not touch me that much after the baby was born. I though it was because my body changed. Guess he was tired from screwing the barmaid at the sports bar.
I begged for sex and all he wanted was beer or baseball...hmmm? Must of been my fault? I pressured him too much? HA!
BTW Stoltz I have one word for you....WAAAAAAAH! If women have to take on male roles it is because men are not doing their part or society forces it. My ex immediately began to lose his job as soon as we got married. Grow up and stop blaming women for your problems. Look in a mirror. Start with yourself? JMHO
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stoltz
Platinum
Reged: 01/29/07
Posts: 1478
Loc: Texas
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BTW Stoltz I have one word for you....WAAAAAAAH!
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Why all the angst?
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If women have to take on male roles it is because men are not doing their part or society forces it.
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Right. Gotcha. Its funny but every year groups try to push young women/girls into Science & Engineering, but still the feminist howl that women aren't represented well in those areas, and so the next year there's an even bigger push, and the cycle continues. Wherein the reality is that most women/girls don;t like science/engineering! But lets force the issue some more and maybe they'll begin to like it. Hmmmm. I know, let's get more corporate sponsorship to make it work! Or, better yet, lobby congress to spend money on it! Maybe - just maybe - there are distinct roles for women and distinct roles for men in our society and trying to put a wedge into one's role just isn't the best idea. Alas, I digress, men are just lazy and therefore there is a shortage of male roles, so women need to fill it. Right.
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Grow up and stop blaming women for your problems.
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If you knew me - I mean REALLY knew me - you'd know that it isn't the women that I blame, but a society that continuously feeds their desires (usually based on flawed information). If nothing else, this study is just one more piece of evidence as to the problems it may be causing. Remember, the study said "The findings are a world away from just ten years ago, when hardly any men contacted them with a loss of libido" whereas now they are seeing "a 40 per cent increase in men who simply cannot be bothered to make love to their wives and partners." I guess it could be the water.
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ljlost
Platinum
Reged: 09/30/06
Posts: 5380
Loc: HELL
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relationship experts dont know shit!! Do you really think people are gonna be 100% honest in thier answers to these people. NO, not always.
SOME men are not interested in sex, SOME women are not interested in sex. SOME guys watch [censored], SOME women watch [censored], some guys like to cuddle just like women, some women are freaks, you just dont know. I dont believe in those relationship experts......once your in a relationship, things like sex, and conversation and all that start to slow down. Thats just life. Its up to the individuals in a relationship, both male and female to find something that will bring back the spark
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stoltz
Platinum
Reged: 01/29/07
Posts: 1478
Loc: Texas
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Do you really think people are gonna be 100% honest in thier answers to these people. NO, not always.
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That's the reason for the 40% decrease - men lie more today than 10 years ago!
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ljlost
Platinum
Reged: 09/30/06
Posts: 5380
Loc: HELL
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NOw, that is true. lol
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juliacinaz
Platinum
Reged: 02/03/08
Posts: 796
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No angst....just get tired of the whining, complaining and blaming. Like I have said...focus on what you can change and let the rest go. It isn't society or women's fault men can't keep it up. Just another way to justify being a limpy!
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Starion
Gold
Reged: 03/04/08
Posts: 122
Loc: South Florida
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In my case it wasn't a matter of getting/keeping it up. It was "i know you want it and I'm going to get something for it". Yes - I wanted it - and many times did it for the release and personal satisfaction. I realized I was becoming a user - because it was for physical release only. My love for her was gone. When banging her I was thinking of someone or something else. I never cheated on her. Then was the emotional penalty... her making me pay in many ways. I shut down as far as doing her - my hand was more satisfying. Of course it was my fault - but did she take any initiative ? no - that's not her responsibility - that's the man's job. Lot's of men want to bang her - I should feel lucky. Well... they can have her.
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Starion
Gold
Reged: 03/04/08
Posts: 122
Loc: South Florida
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Psychologically speaking, men want to make love to a woman - not an ugly soul wrapped in a female body.
Absolutely.
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