jbar
Platinum
Reged: 12/16/06
Posts: 989
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The wife then takes on a more assertive role in the marriage further pushing the masculinity of the husband further to the backburner, which causes a psychological wall to be erected.
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That's exactly what I was talking about. Do you think that she would be able to take on this assertive role if she didn't know that she has her husband "over a barrel"? Do you think that he would stand for it?
As soon as "no fault" divorce became emplaced in this country, any primary wage earner foolish enough to believe in American justice and saving or investing his money, became the financial slave of his spouse. Perhaps it is better for a man to abandon sex, altogether, than to take a chance on either displeasing his wife with his choice of time, place and manner, or by not being "ready" when she is. Worse yet, possibly promoting her paranoid feelings of jealousy and suspicions of infidelity, even if not justified, by enabling her to be certain that her husband is perfectly healthy and functional.
The combination of "no-fault" divorce and "marital property" law is a pernicious and deadly evil, which destroys marriages, and could only have been crafted in Hell, by the Evil One himself! There can rightly be only one or the other, but not both. For infantile fools to believe otherwise is equivalent to wanting to "have your cake and eat it too".
No doubt if vile, demagoguic politicians could get control of the bakeries in this country, the way they have control over marriage law, they would then require them to furnish free cakes to their customers, on demand, in the same way that men have to furnish free money, on demand, to their wives!
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picasso
Platinum
Reged: 09/16/07
Posts: 1839
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[quote]Psychologically speaking, men want to make love to a woman - not an ugly soul wrapped in a female body.
Absolutely. [/quote]
No one wants to have sex with a pretty biatch. Think about it.
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NO FATE
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picasso
Platinum
Reged: 09/16/07
Posts: 1839
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here's my take on the whole gender/role confusion:
My ex tried to be the "man" of the house, but I think there is something innate in women that makes them "automatically" also want to be the "woman" in a relationship.
When women either try to force themselves into, or are forced by their spouse into more of a masculine role in the household, it sets up an internal conflict.
In the beginning, she wanted to prove that she was a rock-solid woman that could wear the pants if she wanted to. Soon after the birth of our son however, her female instincts finally won, and she didnt have a choice anymore but to acknowledge her urge to be nurturing and caring...the more "typical" role of women in a marriage.
Women are seen by most men to be "soft" and "caring". Trust me, its NOT a bad thing, in fact, quite the opposite. Personally, I am very much attracted to women that are cuddly and emotionally available. It's part of what makes a woman a woman. Men don't like to admit it, but there is a part of us that envies a woman's ability to be "soft and mushy" openly, because that's what we want, too. We WANT to be able to express our love for our partner openly and often in a mushy way without risking diminishing our manly appearances.
It's a game of expectations. Women EXPECT men to be hard and stable...we;re not supposed to cry at funerals or when we see a sad movie. Men expect women to cry at movies like Forrest Gump, etc.
There are exceptions to the rule however. I personally think the sexiest thing a woman can wear is a nice summer sun-dress (preferably country yellow). Some men want nasty black lace corsages with garter belts. To each his (or her) own.
I just wish for once, instead of automatically expecting something from someone, we can all learn to just accept one another at face value....while still retaining the qualities that make us attractive to the opposite sex.
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NO FATE
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mistake#2
Platinum
Reged: 07/19/06
Posts: 3136
Loc: Florida
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[quote]I wonder how many of these men, who are no longer interested in sex, have been arbitrarily threatened by their wives with divorce and the loss of everything they have, if they failed to accede to their most outrageous demands.
I wonder how many more, then, became red-faced, stunned and nonplussed, when they found out that she really could do this. Lastly, I wonder how many then began to hate their own sexualities for getting them into such a mess, thus initiating a psychological aversion to sex, eventually leading to impotence.
I know that this is certainly what happened in my own case! [/quote]
hahahaahaaaaaaaaaaaa...JBAR you are tooooo funny.
So in one instance you go from hiring prostitutes and pissing & moaning that your ex could take everything because your banging for money to now your not meeting her outrageous sexual demands so she's going to take you for everything.
hahahaha, anything else to try and further your agenda for divorce shouldn't be legal for women to ascertain?
JBAR is impotent...NO WAY...I think it just finally came down to nobody was willing to give him any, regardless if they were paid or not! Is it true that if you don't use it, you lose it?
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stoltz
Platinum
Reged: 01/29/07
Posts: 1478
Loc: Texas
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Very well said.
And, whether people want to ignore it, laugh at it, or downplay it, IT is happening. From my point of view, women have and are transforming themselves from the traditional female roles in our culture to just about anything they can wedge themselves into (a lot thanks to legislation pushed on by feminists) - including traditional male roles.
More power to them!!!!
However, with this advance, they also have to understand there is a cost involved, and that cost is men not necessarily conforming themselves at the same time, if at all. This study, IMHO, only confirms it.
As you said, men generally want the "softness" and "caring" that generally only a woman can bring to a relationship. However, that is being masked now by a more assertive female taking on more and more masculine roles. It isn't at the conscious level that men are trying to flip the switch from "is she being a woman" or "being a man in a woman's body", but at the subconcious level. The man's subconsious mind instead reacts by going into withdrawal or shutdown mode. Either you're a woman or you're a man - you cannot be both (unless you're a Lesbian). Again, all JMHO.
Again, if a woman wants to take on both roles today, more power to her, I say. Just don't start whining when you realize there aren't any men who fancy the idea of being around your type.
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mrpat
Platinum
Reged: 09/12/07
Posts: 2618
Loc: Michigan
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I don't think it this that or the other. Looking at the fact you don't require sex to survive. Food and water is one thing but sex is an option. Many of us have tucked away that part of life to look for a bigger picture. Sex is great but it can cloud the path to healing for some. The “keep it up” remark while funny is really just a silly remark. In my situation if there is no real interest in having relations with a certain person it's not gonna stay up. It's a preference not a problem. Remember it takes two for sex.
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People don't care how much you know.........until they know how much you care.
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stoltz
Platinum
Reged: 01/29/07
Posts: 1478
Loc: Texas
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The “keep it up” remark while funny is really just a silly remark.
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Its just a shaming tactic some women use. She used another one in an earlier post. See ...
http://www.dumpyourwifenow.com/2007/03/01/the-anti-male-shaming-tactics-catalog/
... for more information on shaming tactics women often use. I've gotten used to it by now.
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jbar
Platinum
Reged: 12/16/06
Posts: 989
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Mistake,
I never said anything about my personal use of prostitutes, on this site, that I can remember. You must be confusing me with someone else.
People like you have about led me to believe that most posters here no longer really have anything important to say, don't (or can't) read meaningful posts, and instead simply try to reduce the dialog here to the lowest possible level of tit-for-tat infantile bickering, foul personal insinuations, and lurid innuendo. I don't imtend to partake in this kind of thing.
If this is the only kind of entertainment you can afford, and you can't even pay for the power to run your idiot box, then I suggest you go to your public library and start on "Atlas Shrugged". If you can get through this book, you can then research all of my previous posts here, and at last understand them. It will be like opening your eyes for the very first time in your life!
Edited by jbar (05/07/08 06:32 PM)
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ATVILLAS
Platinum
Reged: 05/12/07
Posts: 2284
Loc: Lost in the post D maze!!
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[quote]I don't imtend to partake in this kind of thing.[/quote]
Is this a promise? Does this mean we can look forward to you moving on to a different forum that may be more suitable to your level of intellect?
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Help someone smile today!!!
Welcome to paradise!!!
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chatter box
Platinum
Reged: 11/09/07
Posts: 1197
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[quote]Mistake,
I never said anything about my personal use of prostitutes, on this site, that I can remember. [/quote]
It was you or Stolz that said something about going to Navada were it was legal.
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