Divorce Support Forums: Woot, first date

the movie was fun. We had a great time. What kind of started as a one night out turned out to be 3 dates in a row between dinner, movies, walking in the park.

I felt comfortable around her since we were both friends from way back. Both of us were sharing history, playing catch up.

I had her come over so she could see the house since I invited her for a future date for the 4th of July. We walked around, talked some more. Then had one of those "akward looks". the kind of look where the eyes meet and things go silent.

we kissed

both of us had a lot of things in common. both of us were comfortable, both of us got along. The physical act of kissing was great. As a guy I of course enjoyed the feeling, the hormones, the ability to hold a girl in my arms tightly.

just one problem. My heart was steady. It didn't flutter, it was silent.

We were friends enough to be 100% honest with each other. we both kind of admitted that our physical attraction sparked. She said I was a sweet guy, a real gentlemen who is interesting and spontanious. I told her she has a sparkly personality, fun to talk to, and a comfort to be around.

Both of us fell slave to our passions. but didn't expand further than kissing.

Its confusing. I may not be ready to date yet. The ex's stuff is still in boxes to be moved out.

My first intention was going to see a movie with good company, I didn't expect things to become a 3 date weekend. I especially didn't expect the moment on the couch.

I told her, things did get kind of hot and heavy, but it was a good time. I would like to hang out or go out with her more, but next time slow it down. I told her I respect her, and I cherish her friendship and I never never want to lead her on or hurt her.

She never told me her feelings, or what she felt. She wants to be carefull for my sake as well.

This relationship kind of ended up walking a very tight rope.

I do admit, having company was fun, our presence together was enjoyable, yet right now I don't know if we should just remain friends or try actual dating.

I've built up so many boundries on my heart and I've established boundries with her back when I knew her and was with my Ex.

I don't want to just settle, I would like to feel that flutter with someone again, and have them feel the same way back. Yet after having my heart torn out, I just hope I can regain my joy.

PS btw
it's been 20 days since my stbx told me she wants a divorce and is going to move in with her new man.