mommaselina
New
Reged: 11/20/07
Posts: 15
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Has anyone attempted to do a custody modification on their own with no help of a lawyer? if so, where would one start? can you hire a paralegal to draw up paperwork? what are the rules? any advice would be much appreciated. thank you.
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ttina
Platinum
Reged: 02/28/08
Posts: 398
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do you and the other parent agree on a parenting schedule?
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mommaselina
New
Reged: 11/20/07
Posts: 15
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No, at this point it would pretty much be an ambush. He and current spouse are fighting and I spoke to her on the phone. She says they are not doing so well and will probably end up divorced. I know our 13 year old daughter wants to live with me full time. She stated that she doesnt want to stay with her father anymore if her stepmom leaves the home. She has had a horrible relationship with her father for years and we have done counseling for most of those years to try and help their relationship. Her stepmom is the only thing keeping the home sane at this point. We have 50/50 but counselor has said that she thinks child should live with me even before new developements in his home. She feels no progress is made on his part in their relationship. I feel I have a good chance of winning full physical and full legal given all factors. I want to know if it is possible to do it alone successfully. I am a reasonably intelligent person and handled other legal matters in the past on my own with no problems. I have just never handles something this large of a matter where and actual persons fate and living circumstances is concerned. I have heard of lowering legal costs by doing all paperwork yourself and just having an attorney come to court with you to do all the talking. At this point I am just weighing all my options.
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Jada
Platinum
Reged: 06/02/07
Posts: 3463
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Get an attorney, you can write up what you want but a judge isn't just going to sign off on it if the father doesn't agree to the new parenting plan. You will probably have to go through a custody evaluation, mediation. What you want to do is going to cost a lot of money, take a lot of time and may not change the current parenting plan.
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Samsung
Platinum
Reged: 06/14/07
Posts: 2210
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"I feel I have a good chance of winning full physical and full legal given all factors."
What are the factors? In my state, unless there is severe neglect or abuse (accompanied with police reports and criminal conviction as substanciation), it is difficult to change physical custody, and nearly impossible to change legal custody.
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KGrow
Platinum
Reged: 01/27/06
Posts: 3153
Loc: Colorado
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Yeah, unless both parents agree on the modification, you're going to need the help of an attorney. If cost of an attorney is the issue and you have an aptitude for legal thinking, you can potentially keep billing in check by doing the legwork for your attorney. With each step, just ask, "Is this something I can do myself."
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mommaselina
New
Reged: 11/20/07
Posts: 15
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the factors are that her counselor believes that a change in custody is a good idea for the childs benefit and should have limited time with father. Also, fathers brother was just paroled for sodomizing a 16 year old girl and a 7 year old girl. As part of his rehabilitation and "norming" back into society, father has taken it upon himself to have paroled sex offender hang out, watch movies, go to ball games with family, etc. around our child even though it makes her uncomfortable. I put in a call to his parole officer and expressed my concerns, since then contact has been less with minor child. Also, she is a very intelligent child and wishes to live exclusively with me. She is subjected to second hand smoke at dads all the time and has had numerous lung/chest/throat infections over the years. Thanks for all the information, i fully intend on there being a trial. Also, father and stepmom are divorcing, hostile living enviornment. No abuse, but kids know what is going on.
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Samsung
Platinum
Reged: 06/14/07
Posts: 2210
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First of all, who is the counselor that says you should have custody? If not court appointed, what they have to say means nothing. A GAL will be appointed to make a recommendation....and whoever is the better actor often gets custody. You have 50/50 now. In my state, 50/50 is never awarded, but given when both parties agree. In other words, 50/50 from a trial is not a possible outcome. Either you or or him will get custody. Divorce and second hand smoke will carry no weight. If the brother is "eyes on" by your ex or another person, that will also carry little or no weight. You could need deep pockets if your ex fights the custody, and you've got to hire the best, and take it to the end, or you lose.....just a forewarning of what might be to come. Good luck.
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mommaselina
New
Reged: 11/20/07
Posts: 15
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Im in Missouri. Seems as though nothing carries any weight other than full on abuse. Thanks for your imput though.
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Jada
Platinum
Reged: 06/02/07
Posts: 3463
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Given your child's age, her wishes may be taken into consideration and you would be awarded more parenting time, so it would no longer be 50/50. But joint legal isn't going to change.
Since the uncle is a convicted sex offender, you can get it in the court order that the he cannot be around your child. At all. Especially since his victim was a minor child. Doesn't matter if he's eyes on by another adult. He's a danger to the child.
Secondhand smoke, since you didn't have a problem with it when the parenting time was first established, there's not much you are going to be able to do it now.
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