taryn
Platinum
Reged: 05/31/07
Posts: 2460
Loc: standing on the mountaintop! :...
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well with 'cute girl to date' you might chicken out
but who would chicken out with
'practice date girl'?
that would be counter productive!
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taryn.
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kent
Platinum
Reged: 06/13/07
Posts: 2992
Loc: a melted glacier
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Me ... I could chicken out of either one.
BTW -- I did have a nice hour + conversation with her tonight. Kind of figured out where we are eating this weekend. Not set up as a "date" (again -- me = chicken), but .......
As I have said before a good friend is of huge importance to me. The slow (ok like glacier slow) approach is my comfort zone. I know I will have to increase my carbon footprint to make progresss.....
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Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
Dr. Seuss
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gigi
Platinum
Reged: 11/06/06
Posts: 5141
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OMG... green colloquialisms applied to dating! NOW I've heard everything?
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kent
Platinum
Reged: 06/13/07
Posts: 2992
Loc: a melted glacier
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Sadly it works for this situation!
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Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
Dr. Seuss
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kent
Platinum
Reged: 06/13/07
Posts: 2992
Loc: a melted glacier
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OK - so this weekend we are having lunch before we get together with a group of friends.
????? for those of you more experienced than I (OK - everyone). How do you start the uncomfortable talk of the next meal being a date? Or actually letting someone know that you are interested?
No stupid lines please.
I am serious in this question ---
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Today you are You, that is truer than true. There is no one alive who is Youer than You.
Dr. Seuss
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germangirl631
Platinum
Reged: 04/04/08
Posts: 1281
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You could give her a compliment like
"I think you're really interesting and would like to get to know you better". That sets the stage for more than friends but not heavy dating. It lets her know you're into her.
If she sounds cool with that, suggest an intimate place for the next meal.
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gigi
Platinum
Reged: 11/06/06
Posts: 5141
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A few lines that have been used on me at that point:
"OK, so am I IN now?" (followed by immediate backpedaling) "I mean... can we start calling ourselves boyfriend & girlfriend?"
"Would you be OK if I kissed you right now?"
and,
"I guess we should just admit that we like each other and are dating".
The LEAST awkward of the three was the one who asked for a kiss. It was obvious, after the kiss, that it was a "date", but we never actually had to decide whether any one situation was a date.
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taryn
Platinum
Reged: 05/31/07
Posts: 2460
Loc: standing on the mountaintop! :...
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you could just ask her to do something else.
she'll figure it out!
and then...it will be a DATE!
whoo hoo kent!
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taryn.
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gigi
Platinum
Reged: 11/06/06
Posts: 5141
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No talk needed, really... just a hug, lingering a TINY bit longer than it should.
Honestly, that's how most of my friendships became clearly romantic. Now if they NEVER felt comfortable talking about whether or not it was a dating relationship, whether we were "togehter" or should have expectations of each other, ... well, then it was way too awkward for me to handle.
How about, "I've started to think of you as my favorite pal." And then after the discussion starts, you find out if she feels similarly or something (and if she protests, don't assume she doesn't want to be your pal... assume she is hoping for MORE than pals)... well... after the discussion is started, then ask, "what would you think if we started to move towards being more than just pals? Could we handle it? It wouldn't ruin our friendship, would it?"
That way you're being as open with her as you've been with us... about your concerns about the friendship & such. And if you want a romance with the girl, there is no better way to make it work than to be this open with her, figure out how to be as candid about your concerns with her WITH HER, as you are with us.
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