How do you keep you kids from becoming the other parent? If you X is a social path then can you keep you kids from becoming one? My daughter is very good at manipulating her friends and step sister.
I will be watching this with interest, because I have the same concern. Of my 5, only 1 is in danger of this, but it's already pretty close. My 15 yo son is so much like his narcissist father, that was one reason for our divorce. Now, he's getting worse thinking he is the man of the house, with all the entitlements of being an equal!
The only thing I have found in my research , and I don't know if this is valid or helpful... but it said that because the other parent is so unstable and self-centered, YOU have to be the balance, the calm, the loving and supportive one. I can see that for my other 4 who are emotionally abused by him. But my son is becoming just like him because he (ex) spends all his energy and time influencing him.
Other than counseling, the only other thing you can do is to not allow it at your house. Explain why to make sure she understands what she is doing is wrong, then discipline when she continues the behavior. My son picks up bad habits when he spends time with his dad too...sometimes they are little things like burping and smacking with his mouth open while eating, but other ones are more serious like smacking his head against the wall, stomping, saying things like "shut your piehole", and slamming & kicking doors...among other things. The only thing I can do is remind him of the rules at our house and not accept the behavior.
-------------------- **2 1/2 weeks to go...should start counting down the days**
Yep know what you mean. My son can act just like his Dad. I just tell him not to do it. My ex has narcisistic personality traits. I am afraid my son may treat people the way his Dad does.
Here's an example: my son was walking around the house brushing his teeth at the same time-this is something the ex did-he would walk into the living room and stand there brushing his teeth and watching the t.v. I told my son-oh no you are not doing that at my house. Your father did that and I will not have you doing that here.
There will be things that come up that will remind you directly of a behavior you ex had.
When my brother got older his voice sounded just like my Dad's. I can remember asking my Mom if that was hard on her. They were divorced and it was weird to hear the voice but have it coming out of my brother-seemed like my father was there talking.
-------------------- Message for my ex "I think you know by now, I'm not the person I used to be"
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