Divorce Support Forums: Question about adultery

*shrugs* On that note I suppose it's for validation, as for I didn't do anything wrong for forgiveness. I'm an emotionless blob for this man. But IMHO I don't think so either, I've had a couple lawyers tell me I am an open book. Because the first thing that comes to my mind is, "get the facts out, then sit around and explain my "justifications of anger" I guess I'll put it that way. Which is why I think I'm here to vent, and add just one more story to the board, and see what help I can get from that, as well as maybe helping someone in the future. Some people learn from their mistakes, others learn from other peoples mistakes. This man had me as an emotional blob for 5 1/2 years with all of his mind games, I literally thought I was the complete problem as to why he acted towards me the way he did, even though I handled all finances and was the one to make sure everyone was provided for. He thought his whole role in life was to work and have tons of kudos and be treated like a king for.. THIS ?!? no no, that's being an adult, not doing anything extraordinary. The one thing I learned from this whole experience, is... Never get married. Live together, let the court see it common law, but DO not sign that piece of paper, and DO not change your name on your SS#. The man didn't finally decide to walk out on me until the state forced me to change my name on SS or loose my license, which I have to do some more research on. (I say finally, because I had my suspicions that he was cheating on me while gone to work for 8 to 16 days at a time, but I never had any proof.) I mean, come home 4 hours from the time you should be home, when I know you're comeing home because you tell me you are, and then get on my computer to look at [censored], and singles ad's from the place you're working out of, or on a couple of occasions me wakeing up to hearing a porno playing on TV, oh and the never endless " you're paranoid, you're jealous" Well thank you for that insight mr. know it all, i would say after being gone for 8 days you would come home and wake your wife up who might actually be wanting such a thing for so long. Not to mention you go to a convention for buisness, the first night was told to come up, at 12am, "heck no the kids are sleeping I'm tired, I will come tommorow." just go to the next day and find out there was some "woman" running around the whole hotel they were staying at the night before and you have 25 guys there all talking about while slobbering arse drunk, talk about furious, then I throw the "oh come on pls it's been so long" play, and a shower is needed before I'm touched ??? ... WOW i didn't want to be touched after that display, and he has to wonder why ? Yes well, whatever floats your boat. Not to mention a couple times he called me from his work, DRUNK, and had buddies popping off in the background. I wasn't paying attention to the one in the background because I knew he was drunk, and anyone who's been around drunks, know.. that they just blurt random and stupid stuff off at any given moment, yes okay, but when I *don't* hear something.. and everyone goes quiet for a minute or so, then I start to pay attention, okay time flies, then all of the sudden i hear " no this is *myname*..." and his buddy reply with " but I thought you said you was done with that f-in B*****" WOAH red flag. The second time he did this, I brought up my car that he had bought me(because I didn't have a car that would start if I needed to take the children to the hospital ?(which I had to do twice and call my mother at 11 & 12 at night) she came and got me and let me use her car.) which he drove to work, and I ended up having to borrow my brothers truck!!, to tow it home because "the ubolts are snapped." Well!!! I always did wonder how such a thing could happen when that car was in perfect shape before it left the driveway... OH.. could it be the slip of the tongue of the friend that " NOOO man!! you jumped it off that dirt pile remember !?!?!?" well... I officially think beer has it's purpose in this world. Sorry that is a rant, but... if anyone has any insights as to what I could do with that bit of information in court, I'd appreciate it.