Jaylinn
New
Reged: 06/05/08
Posts: 4
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What do you do if there's no specific visitation schedule and one parent refuses to contact the courts or the mediator to set up a visitation schedule? It's a very long story, but the mother left the state a year ago and the father has been taking care of the children by himself physically and financially the whole time (finally got the court to garnish her wages last month). He has asked her repeatedly to work out a visitation schedule, but she refuses and is now requesting the kids for the summer, but has implied in an email that she might not be returning the children after the summer. I'm not sure what rights he has since she still has joint custody. He would be fine with sending the kids down there if he could be assured that she would send them back for the school year.
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justmejulia
Gold
Reged: 04/12/07
Posts: 186
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No way in hell I wouls send my kids for the summer with nothing in writing from the court about their return.
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Jaylinn
New
Reged: 06/05/08
Posts: 4
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That's how he feels, but he doesn't know if he tells her that if he would be denying her the right to her children. All he wants is a formal schedule that they both agree with, but she refuses to deal with the court system at all. He's not even sure if he gets her to sign something stating that she will return them on a specified date whether that will be legal.
He would have money to hire a lawyer if he hadn't had just spent the entire year providing for them without her help.
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hispoohbear
Bronze
Reged: 05/21/07
Posts: 47
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He should file with the courts then. Then she can't refuse to deal with the court system. My advice is watch out. She doesn't want anything on paper for some reason, and it is probably not good for him. He should be able to get help from a Legal Aid type thing. Here we have a self help number you can call to get advice and directions on how to file yourself for free.
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Jaylinn
New
Reged: 06/05/08
Posts: 4
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When he filed for full custody and child support, the court requested her presence at the court and mediation and she refused to appear at either. The court and mediator called her repeatedly and she refused to pick up the phone and return their calls.
Thanks for pointing out the help info on the site. I've just been looking around in the forums. I see that there are links to parenting agreements. If he manages to get her to sign one of those, can it be upheld in court (if she decides not to send the children back at the end of the summer)?
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jersey girl
Platinum
Reged: 08/07/06
Posts: 1571
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If he gets her to sign an order and then gets the court to approve, but there has to be an open and pending divorce and custody case.
Here is the other side - this woman could appear at ANY time, take the kids and leave and he has no recourse. He needs a lawyer now.
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Jaylinn
New
Reged: 06/05/08
Posts: 4
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That's what I've started to realize. Since she still has joint custody, she can just take them whenever she wants and who knows when he'll see them again.
It just seems unfair that he's done the right thing, taken care of his children by himself, went all this time without financial help and now he can't afford a lawyer because she refused to contribute and made his life a living hell every chance she's gotten. She has enough money to afford a lawyer and could easily fight this if he had to file on his own. It just doesn't seem right.
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Jada
Platinum
Reged: 06/02/07
Posts: 3314
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The response:
Until there is a set parenting plan in place, there is no summer visitation.
Has anyone filed for custody? I would save those e-mails from the mother, they show that he has a very legitimate concern about the children being returned.
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