HAHA. I second that Pfffft. I'm also going to throw in a "Whatev's" and a hand to the face. And now I am going to cuddle on the couch with my four year old while we watch The Princess and the Pauper. This has been a really good day. Good night everybody!
-------------------- Everything now is as it should be.
You need to focus on what is best for your daughter and what is fair to her and both parents. You both have joint custody. What is reasonable ? I would think it is fair that your daughter has a vacation with her father during a holiday week. Then you can have her the next year holiday week.
If the father wants to be in his daughter's life more, you should be happy. Better than an absentee father for your daughter's sake. You may not be able to be great friends with your Ex - but you have to be reasonable and civil like a business relationship as co-parents.
If the terms aren't fair to one parent, they are likely to go back to court to have a more fair agreement and or try to withhold child support, etc.
Well he can't go back for more custody because I already agreed to 50/50 and we have a set parenting agreement for a reason. Just because he changes his mind arbitrarily does not mean I have to agree. We literally have every holiday split and assigned, and that was for a very good reason. Fortunately I DON'T have to be manipulated by him or put up with his bs. And I am so glad and grateful that I do have a court motion filed to protect my own rights. As far as being reasonable, I think I am being realistic when I say no communication is necessary. I find myself much more forgiving and happy when I don't speak to him. Our lives are totally separate. That is reality. And in order to be calm and collected, I have to follow the old adage, "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all." That's not to say I don't want him to be happy with his new gf. I think they should have a happy ending. I hope that he can be a better man with her. Lord knows we were never happy together and I hope that he can offer my daughter some stability in his home and a genuine loving relationship. I don't want him to be miserable and stuck in a relationship he didn't want because she got pregnant. If he is miserable, chances are he will try to make me miserable too. And I would so much rather have a peaceful life where I don't have to deal with an [censored] for an ex. Maybe if he's happy with her, he can stop trying to tell me how to be a parent and start focusing on getting a job to pay for his two kids. Ha.
-------------------- Everything now is as it should be.
Your ex sounds like my ex. It took me a long time to realize that I can just hang up the phone and that I don't have to listen to his bs, or that I can just walk away from him. It's amazing how much better I feel about myself without him around to put me down.
He does the same thing regarding vacations - we are supposed to give 30 days notice. He'll wait until the week before and ask for a week. God forbid if I have already made plans for my daughter - I'll get harrassed by him. One time I actually had to take the phones off the hook because he wanted her for a week's vacation with two days notice and my daughter and I were going away to visit relatives so I said no. I can understand how 30 days notice can be difficult but two days? I'm supposed to just sit around all summer and not make any plans for the time my daughter is with me just in case he decides he wants vacation time.
I hope your ex becomes happy with the girlfriend and stops using you for his anger outlet. It's so true...!