boobaby
Platinum
Reged: 05/01/07
Posts: 320
Loc: mass
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I must say I never appreciated all the things my ex did around here. For instance, just mowing the lawn has turned into a huge deal. First I had to buy a lawn mower (he took ours) and I needed one with a keystart which cost more than I wanted to. Then trying to figure out how to get the monster home in my car. After squeezing the box into the car I had to drive 40 miles with my rearview mirror blocked from the huge box. Taking the box out proved even more disastrous. Pushing and shoving I finally got the box out (20 mins. later) only to have it fall on my leg, leaving a huge scape down my calf. Ok, so now the lawn mower is home, I'm nicely bandaged up from my injury, but wait, it needs gas, so I go to the store to buy a gas jug and fill it up hoping that the gas does not spill over my car. Got the mower filled but still needed to attach the bagger - forget it!!! Can't figure that one out. So I'm off with my new mower carelessly mowing the lawn until I hit a patch of poison ivy!! Back to the store to buy Roundup to kill the stuff. Did I mention I didn't appreciate this enough when my ex did it?? I also found out that with my new lawn mower I can create sandstorms that would put any sandstorm in the deserts to shame. So with my surgical mask and goggles I continued on with my mission only to find that 2 days later I was still blowing dirt out of my nose.
Today it was gutter cleaning day. Same type of thing, had to haul the ladder around the house (huge extension ladder that reaches to the sky)finding the right tools (mop and swiffer) to clean the gutters, fixing the nozzle on the hose to flush the debris away (got sprayed in the face while fixing that), getting covered with muddy leaves and who knows what else as it comes splashing down on my face. Never wear a white shirt when cleaning gutters - mine is now polka dotted with gunk from the gutters. I could go on and on, but I have to say, I tip my hat to all you guys (and women too!) who do this stuff on a regualar basis. I think next year, I'll hire someone to do gutters for me.
Tomorrow is another day-painting trim work day, lets see where did I put that ladder???????
Edited by boobaby (06/24/08 07:28 PM)
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stoltz
Platinum
Reged: 01/29/07
Posts: 1494
Loc: Texas
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This reminds me of a cartoon I saw in a paper long ago. It showed an enormous stereo system in a house that was left on by a teenager. It was blaring loud music, but had about a gazillion knobs on it. The wife asks the husband to turn it off to which the husband makes a comment that he will as long as she realizes that men are better equipped to handle mechanical things moreso than women. After a minute or two of listening to the loud music, she gives in and admits that men are better at mechanical/electronic gizmos as long as he turns it off NOW.
He then unplugs from the outlet it in the back.
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juliacinaz
Platinum
Reged: 02/03/08
Posts: 962
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I have this same scenario playing out at my house every weekend. I have the scars to prove it! Amazingly enough I get some feelings of worth when I can finally do some of this stuff without injury! By the way I currently have a huge scrape on my leg from the rock the weedwacker shot at me last Saturday!
I met a man on POF tonight and after chatting for 10 minutes we realized we are neighbors. He came over and opened up my bucket of chlorine tablets for my pool that I have not been able to open. Then he helped me replace a pop up sprinkler on the lawn I have been fighting with for a few days now. He just got divorced and is obviously hurting so I am gonna let him fix a few more things and maybe make him dinner!!!
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tookway2much
Platinum
Reged: 03/31/08
Posts: 627
Loc: Going toward the light!
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Wow! You women must have had better husbands than mine. I
always cut the grass, mend the fences, cook, cleaned, worked full time. Nope! Still don't miss him.
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I don't worry about the people in my past. There is a reason they are not in my future.
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weatherman
Platinum
Reged: 03/25/07
Posts: 1062
Loc: GA
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I really appreciate hearing that. Thanks.
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Sometimes there's just not enough rocks? There's plenty of rocks.
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Mr.Revenge
Platinum
Reged: 04/28/08
Posts: 367
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OMG boobaby,
I'm so sorry, but that actually gave me a "belly laugh" that I think has been needed for months!!!!!
Sorry for your heartache and pain, but DAMN you are a talented humorist!!!!!
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boobaby
Platinum
Reged: 05/01/07
Posts: 320
Loc: mass
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Julia- oh, you're so lucky to have someone to fix things for you!! Maybe it will save you a few more scars. I haven't used my weedwacker yet, I'm afraid I'll take an eye out or something. Maybe I should search my neighborhood for recently divorced men looking for something to do. Can't hurt right?
Revenge- glad I gave you a belly laugh but the sad thing is its all true!!!! Maybe my manly skills will improve with time, but I'm not sure I'll survive to find out. Ha!!!!!!!
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germangirl631
Platinum
Reged: 04/04/08
Posts: 1338
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Another neighborhood resource is retired men. My neighbor edged my sidewalk for me (ran his edger) and then I cleaned up the mess. His part was probably easier, but I probably would have cut my fingers off with the edger. So, I'm happy with the arrangement. By the time men are retired, they usually have every tool a man could need, and you can borrow them if you're nice. :) I always offer beer for the trade.
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Mr.Revenge
Platinum
Reged: 04/28/08
Posts: 367
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OMG,
If I EVER feel like I'm gonna lose my mind in grief, I'm comin' back to this post. Again, I am so sorry, and I know it is true...that just makes what you write so much more humorous!!!
Please make sure you get the goggles out for that weedwacker...been there, done that, grateful I still have my sight!!!
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mfergel
Platinum
Reged: 02/11/08
Posts: 1468
Loc: Richmond, VA
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yeah, I don't think my ex appreciated it until she had to do it. She doesn't even take care of pulling the weeds and such. Plus, I did all my own laundry, cooked the majority of the time, etc. She did take care of the bills, not that I couldn't, but she's a CPA so she was really good at managing that stuff.
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Insert witty comment here. 
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movingon2
Platinum
Reged: 12/06/07
Posts: 209
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Oh wait to you try the weed wacking boobaby! It's the best!
Takes twenty minute to start the things up! When it finally starts up your arm is about ready to fall off and then you can't hold on to the thing because you are sweating so much it freakin slides all over the place! No GRIP. Can't see either because the goon googles get all steamed up!
When you finally get it together the freakin string runs out and you have to go through the entire process again. You get so ticked off because you know you started at 9am it's now 12pm and all that has been accomplished is the edge of one flower bed (and that looks pitiful! Clumps of grass missing). You keep at it and when you finally conquer it your legs are scarred for life! Yep, did the weed wacking last week and I'm still picking splinters from my legs! Apparently the mulch got in the way when I was wacking!
Ah well, was it John Lennon who said there are no problems only solutions?
Some pretty good advice given from the forum ladies/gents. I especially like germangirl's idea. Good thinking there! My Solution, I am moving in the next few weeks. The back yard is decked out! Literally! It has a huge decked yard surrounded by a picket fence. Beyond the picket fence is a beautiful green golf course. And I don't have to mow or weedwack the freakin thing! I just have to admire..just like I did in the ole days. Wait a minute, I cut the grass in the ole days ... Life ain't so bad after all!!!! :)
Tip: I’ll need to weedwack one more time before I retire the wacker tool to a permanent spot in the garage. During the next session, I will be wearing a pair of my stbx thick socks. I might look a sight, but I’m going to pull them suckers right up past my knees and wack away!
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'I fight on, I fight to win' ~ The Iron Lady
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Mr.Revenge
Platinum
Reged: 04/28/08
Posts: 367
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I just can't stop reading this and laughing my ass off!!! I'm so sorry boobaby, but this is so damn funny (it should be published - maybe "Reader's Digest"?).
You used a "mop and swiffer" for the gutters???
OMG!!! This post has literally kept me "outta the gutter"!!!!!
Please keep us posted on future "home maintenance projects"!!!
I can't stop laughing or reading it over and over...so sorry.
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juliacinaz
Platinum
Reged: 02/03/08
Posts: 962
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Geez I better not post the story about replacing my car battery then! I have watched guys do it now at the store and laughed!
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germangirl631
Platinum
Reged: 04/04/08
Posts: 1338
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Have you ever tried to assemble a piece of "some assembly required" furniture by yourself? OMG! The pieces are rarely labeled correctly. The instructions usually sukk. Nothing goes together like it should. I usually end up having to redo at least one section of the assembly to get it to work because something ends up going on backwards or upside down.
And, you think your handy dandy drill driver will insert all those screws for you. But, being a dainty female, you can't press hard enough while screwing in the screws and their heads end up getting stripped. So, you've now got a bunch of screws sticking out of your furniture that you can't get in or out since the heads are stripped. I have stopped using my handy dandy drill driver and usually work with manual tools, now. So much for "more power" (as Tim Allen would say). I just end up with blistered hands.
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HardKnox
Platinum
Reged: 06/13/07
Posts: 2764
Loc: Wisconsin
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Ummmm....we do have a service here called "Have Weener / Will Travel" that can handle that kinda stuff for you.
Our rates are EXTREMELY reasonable.
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beblebrox
Platinum
Reged: 06/12/08
Posts: 340
Loc: Western Pennsylvania
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just a thought. if you don't feel as if you have enough "umph" to put into the power screwdriver, make the small investment and goto Sears, or a similar store and get wnat is sometimes called an "easy out". they are special bits designed to remove stripped screws. I have found they are equally good at really digging in to put the screw in. Just be advised, they tent to chew up the head of the screw, so be sure you are doing it right, since you'll probably only get one shot.
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movingon2
Platinum
Reged: 12/06/07
Posts: 209
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[quote]just a thought. if you don't feel as if you have enough "umph" to put into the power screwdriver, make the small investment and goto Sears, or a similar store and get wnat is sometimes called an "easy out". they are special bits designed to remove stripped screws. I have found they are equally good at really digging in to put the screw in. Just be advised, they tent to chew up the head of the screw, so be sure you are doing it right, since you'll probably only get one shot. [/quote]
beblebrox, thank you for the sound advice...something we all could use. Mr. Revenge, maybe it would be a good idea to start a separate forum to where men and women could post questions relating to home/yard/car maintenance.
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'I fight on, I fight to win' ~ The Iron Lady
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Mr.Revenge
Platinum
Reged: 04/28/08
Posts: 367
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HK,
Don't know what your rates are, but if she's using a "mop and swiffer" to clean the gutters, my rate is FREE...CHARITY...OMG, this poor lady...sadly, I have been laughing (with complete understanding and compassion) for HOURS...maybe it's the curse of being able to visualize so well???
In any case, so sorry boobaby.
Please put the weedwacker, mop, swiffer, lawnmower, etc. away for now to heal!!!
I'm so sorry, but your description just keeps crackin' me up!!!
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Mr.Revenge
Platinum
Reged: 04/28/08
Posts: 367
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[quote] Mr. Revenge, maybe it would be a good idea to start a separate forum to where men and women could post questions relating to home/yard/car maintenance. [/quote]
Did I upset you movingon2, or did I just interpret that incorrectly? I meant no harm. If so, my sincere apology.
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movingon2
Platinum
Reged: 12/06/07
Posts: 209
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Mr. Revenge
Upset me? Absolutely not :)
You mentioned something in an earlier post “Please keep us posted on future "home maintenance projects"!!! I am just branching from your idea. I think it would be great if we could set up a forum to where we could post questions and hopefully get answers. Whether a man or woman, we are going to come across things that we are not use to doing, and sometimes we will need help. For example, I’m a gourmet cook (LOL), I could give someone WONDERFUL advice on how to make great homemade waffles! At the same time, should I ever have to change a tire on the vehicle, I’ve no idea what tool I would use????
Maybe we could put our good skills to use and help those in need. Just a thought.
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'I fight on, I fight to win' ~ The Iron Lady
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boobaby
Platinum
Reged: 05/01/07
Posts: 320
Loc: mass
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Yes, I actually had a mop in one hand, my swiffer in the other and the hose tied around the top of the ladder all the while balancing on the ladder (not too smart there). I would "mop" the underside of the gutter to remove all the moldy gunk that has been growing there for a while, spray, dig the gunk out of the gutter with the swiffer, spray, mop the underside again, spray, dig, spray, you get the idea. Needless to say my arms felt like wet noodles afterwards and I had dead leaves and mud stuck to my hair and face, not a pretty sight. But boy did I feel like I accomplished something after finishing it!!!! But I do think I will hire someone next time. I'll keep you guys in mind!!!!
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happytobdivorced
Platinum
Reged: 03/15/07
Posts: 1128
Loc: Hell, USA
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Me too! Did it ALL. Mine did nothing. I am used to it. I own alot of tools too-my boyfriend finds this very strange. I even asked for some tools for xmas-he was very against buying a woman tools. I insisted! I love tools. Oh and don't mess with my tools-they are for my use only!
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Message for my ex "I think you know by now, I'm not the person I used to be"
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Mr.Revenge
Platinum
Reged: 04/28/08
Posts: 367
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movingon2,
Thanks for clarifying. My bad. The insecurity that has "wormed" its way into me since the "Day From Hell" has sometimes fogged my ability to decipher things. Thought you were suggesting I go to "another" forum.
Glad I didn't upset you, and thanks again for letting me know that.
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What will I lose
Platinum
Reged: 05/21/07
Posts: 764
Loc: PA
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this is a funny thread. So i got to thinking about what i'd 'logistically' miss when my wife is gone.
1. someone to sign for packages since she's home all day
2. someone to use as an excuse at work to have to stay home and take care of
3. someone to make sure all the right program were recording on tivo
4. parking close with handicap tags in nice wide spaces (no one dings your door) is gonna be missed in winter but in summer i dont mind walking
5. i rarely need them but if im in a lotta pain from some work i've done etc she has great drugs to take
i cant think of anything else. I DO everything else for her. Matter of fact she hampered me from doing certain things i cant wait to do (paint over all her cig smoke etc)
Otherwise i'm totally self sufficient and always was. Just wont be able to use her disability check to go to the casinos anymore but i'm sure i can find cheaper things to do :)
Now i'm sure if she was posting this her reply would be totally opposite.
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call me WWIL...PA resident 39 year old , married 11 years, together 12...splitting in 13th year.
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boobaby
Platinum
Reged: 05/01/07
Posts: 320
Loc: mass
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I just started acquiring my own tools. I now have a hammer, a screwdriver, little package of nails and screws, and some other thing that I have no clue what it is for. They are all neatly tucked away in a little wicker basket (no messy tool box for me)just waiting for me to use them. They even have pretty pink handles on them (no manly tools for me!) Oh, and I have wire, hows that to tackle all these projects around here. Thats why I have to get creative when I clean my gutters!! Lol.
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Mr.Revenge
Platinum
Reged: 04/28/08
Posts: 367
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Still can't stop picturing your vivid description and laughing. So sorry. You are just too funny!!!
OMG, you have pulled me "outta the gutter"!!! (Now would you please disengage the "swiffer"???).
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boobaby
Platinum
Reged: 05/01/07
Posts: 320
Loc: mass
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Swiffer is disengaged and ready for its next mission (who knows what that might be). I bet you didn't know the swiffer was multipurpose.
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Mr.Revenge
Platinum
Reged: 04/28/08
Posts: 367
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I only know 2 things about a "swiffer":
1. It is not for "gutter cleaning", and
2. It hurts like HELL!!!
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movingon2
Platinum
Reged: 12/06/07
Posts: 209
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[quote]movingon2,
Thanks for clarifying. My bad. The insecurity that has "wormed" its way into me since the "Day From Hell" has sometimes fogged my ability to decipher things. Thought you were suggesting I go to "another" forum.
Glad I didn't upset you, and thanks again for letting me know that. [/quote]
Ooops, sorry…I didn’t mean for you to interpret my thread as to go to another forum…no, no, no, I like you way too much! :)
This entire thread is funny, I’m having a giggle too…humor beats being down in the dumps any day!
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'I fight on, I fight to win' ~ The Iron Lady
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Mr.Revenge
Platinum
Reged: 04/28/08
Posts: 367
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movingon2,
Thanks.
I agree about the humor.
Pretty much all I have to sustain me right now.
boobaby,
PLEASE tackle another project and write about it!!!!! (But be careful. Not writing, but with the project).
I have not laughed this long for MONTHS!!!
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beblebrox
Platinum
Reged: 06/12/08
Posts: 340
Loc: Western Pennsylvania
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[quote]Me too! Did it ALL. Mine did nothing. I am used to it. I own alot of tools too-my boyfriend finds this very strange. I even asked for some tools for xmas-he was very against buying a woman tools. I insisted! I love tools. Oh and don't mess with my tools-they are for my use only! [/quote]
Huh? That's crazy. Everyone, regardless of gender, needs at least a basic set of tools. When you have to get worried is if you find yourself buying special purpose tools thaqt you know you'll only use once. if you do, then you have too much time on your hands!! :)
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boobaby
Platinum
Reged: 05/01/07
Posts: 320
Loc: mass
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Revenge,
I will keep you posted of any other projects (I have a ton of them!!) Relaying the brick in my garden area should be a treat. Glad you enjoyed this thread so much and I was able to bring a smile to your face. We all need to smile and laugh!!!
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movingon2
Platinum
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