NuWife
New
Reged: 06/30/08
Posts: 3
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Hi There, I have been married for two years. and My husbands ex wife has since moved in twice. First time she and I had a massive argument about my child. And now she is back b/c she has no where to go again. Husband says if we dont help her who will. The thing is she had an affair and had a child from that affair, this is what caused my husband and her to break up. Yet its as if he feels obligated to her for some reason, so much so he has adopted her child from this man she had the affair with.It is likes he owes her something. The only reason i am helping is because of her child. Please offer some advise. He treats her like she is still her wife to me. he says that I am his only wife.
PLEASE HELP!! UNHAPPY CONFUSED
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taryn
Platinum
 
Reged: 05/31/07
Posts: 2258
Loc: Hell...but im coming back up, ...
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wow.
THIS is messed UP!
as the current wife, i would not be really handling this well. not at all.
-------------------- taryn.
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alizzie007
New
Reged: 04/29/08
Posts: 15
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No No No and absolutely not would be my response. I would not be ok with that and you have every right to be upset. Maybe you should tell him that during the time that his 'ex' wife is there, you will be staying somewhere else to give him "family time"... Tell him you'll be staying at an ex-boyfriends/husbands because you (like the ex wife) have nowhere else to go. See how he feels about that!
-------------------- "I am not afraid. I was born to do this..."
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katiebear22
Silver
Reged: 11/04/06
Posts: 58
Loc: Texas
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Ohmygosh! And you've handled this once already?! WOW! I would have said "absolutely NOT". She is an adult... which means she can find other family, friends... a shelter, or a park bench. The child would be welcome, but that is all, and even that is a stretch.
Unfortunately, it sounds like she does it because she can... and she CAN as long as you (yes you have some part in this) and your husband ALLOW her to do so. If you guys tell her to get lost and stop being her crutch, she'll have to figure it out on her own or at least find someone else to keep her afloat.
P.S. If my husband wanted his ex to come live with us, I would tell him he's welcome to go find a place for her, but as long as I'm THE wife, she's not stepping foot into MY home!
-------------------- "Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts."
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KGrow
Platinum

Reged: 01/27/06
Posts: 3153
Loc: Colorado
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What state? Utah?
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Sarah1014
Platinum
 
Reged: 04/12/07
Posts: 2279
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[quote]No No No and absolutely not would be my response. I would not be ok with that and you have every right to be upset. Maybe you should tell him that during the time that his 'ex' wife is there, you will be staying somewhere else to give him "family time"... Tell him you'll be staying at an ex-boyfriends/husbands because you (like the ex wife) have nowhere else to go. See how he feels about that! [/quote]
Oh, I totally got a great laugh out of this one! LOLOLOL!!!
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Sarah1014
Platinum
 
Reged: 04/12/07
Posts: 2279
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[quote]What state? Utah? [/quote]
OMG!!!! ROFLMAO!!!!
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gigi
Platinum
 
Reged: 11/06/06
Posts: 5052
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My thoughts exactly. That or Muslim, where certain sects practice polygamy. I'd be outta there quickly, let him sort it out who was his choice for a wife, and move on from there (understading full well that it looks likely that SHE is the one he is choosing).
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taryn
Platinum
 
Reged: 05/31/07
Posts: 2258
Loc: Hell...but im coming back up, ...
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good point.
your husband is SO SO! choosing his first wife over you.
time to take some money and beat it, girl!
you do NOT want to be second place!
-------------------- taryn.
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NuWife
New
Reged: 06/30/08
Posts: 3
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I wish i could do all these things, but it is like I have already given them the assumption that i am okay with it. Now everyone else besides me acts like we are one big happy family. What is even more saddening is that my baby calls her mommy, he thinks we are both his mommy. None of her children calls me that, what gives her the right i ask myself. I guess i have already made my bed now i have to lay in it
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